Dear Louisiana: A carton of Get-a-Clue for you

For all the political dolts in my home state who still think slathering tax money around for short-term political gain is any way to run a government, here's an example of what can happen when you spend money strategically in areas where you'll get the biggest bang for the buck.

And that example is in your own back yard. And it's just made big news all around the world. And maybe some people who don't know better might be thinking Louisiana is being run by way smarter people than it actually is.

Hard to believe anyone could be that gullible, but who knows what might happen PR-wise if the state -- and its voters -- began to value knowledge instead of acting all pissy toward those who have some? Here's some of an article by Agence France-Presse, which is based in France, which is across the sea:

A common virus that causes colds can be a factor in obesity, according to a study released Monday offering further evidence that a weight problem may be contagious.

The adenovirus-36 (Ad 36) has already been implicated as the cause of weight gain in animals, but with this study researchers showed for the first time that it can also cause humans to pile on the pounds.

The findings could accelerate the development of a vaccine or an antiviral medication to help fight the battle of the bulge alongside diet and exercise.

"We're not saying that a virus is the only cause of obesity, but this study provides stronger evidence that some obesity cases may involve viral infections," said Magdalena Pasarica, an obesity researcher at the Pennington Biomedical Research Center at Louisiana State University in Baton Rouge.

A previous study found that almost a third of obese people are infected with the virus compared to around one in 10 of their leaner counterparts.

In laboratory experiments, the Louisana State University researchers found that the bug appeared to promote the formation of fat cells from stem cells.

The team took adult stem cells from fatty tissue left over from patients who had undergone liposuction, a procedure to remove fat, and exposed some of it to Ad-36, leaving the rest untreated.

After a week of growth in tissue culture, most of the virus-infected adult stem cells developed into fat cells, whereas the untreated cells did not.

It's not clear what drives the transformation, how long the virus lingers in the human system or whether its fat-enhancing effect continues after the body has cleared the virus, the researchers said.

A study in animals found that they remained obese up to six months after the infection had cleared.

The Louisiana State University team is working on further studies to try and establish why some people with the virus develop obesity while others don't.

EMBALMED ALIVE! PINKO PJ PLAGUE!

The Horrific Hell Regime in Beijing has unleashed yet another component of its evil scheme to wreak its Commie blitzkrieg to subdue the Free World in a tidal wave of Death Thru Defects.

Oh, sorry about that. Something unleashed my inner Drudge when I saw the following Financial Times story linked to on . . . uh . . . Drudge:

The safety problems affecting Chinese goods spread from toys to textiles on Monday as New Zealand said it would investigate allegations that imported children’s clothes contained dangerous levels of formaldehyde.

The government ordered the probe after scientists hired by a consumer watchdog programme discovered formaldehyde in Chinese clothes at levels of up to 900 times regarded as safe. Manufacturers sometimes apply formaldehyde to clothes to prevent mildew. It can cause skin rashes, irritation to the eyes and throat and allergic reactions.

The Warehouse, a New Zealand retailer, issued a recall at the weekend for children’s pyjamas made in China after two children were burned when their flannelette nightclothes caught fire.

The New Zealand investigation is the first time that the safety of Chinese clothes has been called into question; concerns have been raised over a series of Chinese products in recent months, including toys, food and toothpaste. Last week, Mattel said it was recalling 18.2m toys globally because of hazards such as the use of lead paint.

COME TO THINK OF IT, the sheer amount of dangerously defective crap being unleashed from Chinese factories certainly is worthy of a good conspiracy theory or three.

Scooby Doo wants to be the new Buckskin Bill

Click on photo for video.

When I was in college at Louisiana State, there was only one proper greeting if you ran across broadcasting instructor Bill Black, say, eating lunch at Mickey D's.

"Hey, Buckskin!"

For a whole generation of kids born and raised in Baton Rouge, La., the man was -- is -- Buckskin Bill. For 35 years on WAFB television, he would lead us young'uns in "The Monday Morning March" and tell us to sit up straight when we were slouching in front of the TV set.

I didn't know how he knew.

WHEN I WAS REALLY LITTLE, I thought Buckskin lived in the television. By the time I sat on Buckskin's lap -- on his show for my fourth birthday and terrified of the gigantic TV cameras -- I knew he lived at the WAFB studios and obviously was omniscient. That day in 1965, he was in the middle of a drive to collect aspirin for the medicine-poor Amazon region of Brazil. I brought some to drop into the big barrel of Bayer.

Likewise, Buckskin would remind us at the end of every morning Storyland or afternoon Buckskin Bill Show that Baton Rouge needed a zoo.

In 1969, he'd have kids march before the cameras, dropping their pennies into a safe to buy the first two elephants for the new Greater Baton Rouge Zoo.

Buckskin Bill was on WAFB -- first on Channel 28 and then after it moved to Channel 9 -- from 1955 to 1990. By the time new owners of Channel 9 yanked Storyland in favor of Regis and Kathie Lee, I had been married for seven years and living here in Omaha for two.

I may have cried when I heard the news. I know I wrote a scathing and outraged letter to the station manager.

See, a whole generation of us had grown up on Buckskin Bill and had continued to watch, from time to time, all the way into adulthood. You don't turn your back on family just because you're no longer in the targeted demographic, you know?

Family. That's what Buckskin Bill was. In some ways, he was more family for some of us than family was.

ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY that a couple of Baton Rouge media types -- one of whom happens to be the latest voice of Scooby Doo -- have some mighty humongous shoes to fill if they aspire to be the new Buckskin Bill. Here's the story from 225 magazine:

The program Buckskin Bill’s Storyland was the last locally-produced children’s TV show, which means no one in Baton Rouge under 35 has grown up with a hometown TV hero.

Enter two distinctly local costumed characters—Hollywood Hal and Rhinestone Al. They’re the goofy, affable singing duo of Hollywood Hal and Rhinestone Al and the Wannabees. They entertain preschoolers with jokes and educational video clips each weekday at 7:30 a.m. on Cox Channel 4.

“It’s educational, motivational and inspirational,” says Jim Hogg, the show’s co-creator and the man inside the Rhinestone Al suit.

Radio DJ Scott Innes plays Hollywood Hal. He was Hogg’s co-anchor on local radio station WYNK-FM for years. Hogg left the station last year to devote his efforts full-time to the kids’ show, while Innes still takes the WYNK mic for afternoon drive time.

Like most shows that target viewers under the age of eight, the show is short on plot. The pair doesn’t really do much except sing a handful of twangy tunes, which cover everything from barnyard animals to the importance of saying no to drugs. The Wannabees are their backup singers, a trio of fuzzy yellow jacket puppets.

“The Wannabees are really all the kids in America who want to be something when they grow up,” Innes says.

YOU'VE GOT TO WISH these folks good luck for even trying to do local children's programming once again. But if you ask this Baby Boomer who was privileged to tap into the signal of "big, booming, powerful Channel 9" a couple of times a day, every day, to be entertained and taught by "Buckskin Bill" Black . . . well, no kiddie show is complete without Candy the Chimpanzee or Señor Puppet.

"And remember kids, you're never completely dressed until you put on a smile."

* * *

To learn more about Buckskin Bill, go here and here. Here, too.

Bush prepares for Dean's onslaught

NEWS ITEM:

CRAWFORD, Texas (AP) -- President Bush, who was criticized for a slow federal response to Hurricane Katrina, took a pre-emptive strike Saturday against Hurricane Dean blowing through the Caribbean and threatening the Texas coast.

Thanks to the president's quick action, Dean should not be a problem that FEMA and the United States government can't handle with ease:

Omaha . . . a city in three acts

I've been thinking I need to post something else today (tonight, now), but I don't feel like expounding on anything. So instead of doing something constructive, I've put the Grand Ole Opry on my 1936 Zenith tombstone radio and have been looking at YouTube videos. (Old farts can multitask, too.)

And I've come up with three very different videos about my city, Omaha. So I thought I'd put them all here -- Omaha, a city in three acts.

Enjoy.

HYSTERICAL HELL HEADLINE SET FOR WEB

I'm just wonderin' here . . . once you've gone the "Historic Hell Storm" route with your headline and hurricane coverage, where is there left to go if the thing gets REALLY bad?

And heads for the U.S. Gulf coast.

IN THAT EVENT, if we surfed on over to Drudge, perhaps we'd we find something like:


DEATH IS BLOWIN' IN THE WIND

APOCALYPSE NOW!

BIBLICAL HELL CATACLYSM STALKS GULF COAST

Or perhaps we'd awake one morning, turn on the computer and simply read:

Inquiring minds want to know.

It's Dolly, that's who

Mathilda, I'm leaving it up to you to listen to the Revolution 21 podcast. Sweet dreams.

Ever spend most of the summer in South Louisiana, at a camp between the river and the swamp?

Just down the road from an honest-to-god honky tonk?

I have.

I'M NOT SURE what's more memorable, the reeeeeeeeeoww reeeeeeeeeoww reeeeeeeeeoww all-night song of the tree frogs. The droning of the locusts and chirping of the crickets. Perhaps the haunting hooooooooooooooOW of an owl, up in the gum tree by the porch.

Maybe it's the sticky-hot night air of the Louisiana summer, made up of something like one-fifth oxygen and four-fifths water vapor -- an atmosphere more suited to drinking than breathing. Certainly not suited to sleeping, because it's half-past midnight, you're still awake, you're stripped down to your Fruit of the Looms, and you're still sweating.

Sleep being futile for your adolescent self, you kneel in the bed and gaze out the window toward the bright lights of The Barn, the juke joint on the river and down the gravel road. There's an old man, full of whiskey, puking into the weed patch behind the club.

And there's the doom BOO doo doot DOOM, BOO doo doot DOOM coming fron the smoke-filled, beer-soaked interior of Juke Joint Central, penetrating the walls that hide its middle-of-the-night mysteries from teen-aged eyes, peering from down the road. That wonderful swamp-pop bass line surfing the sultry waves of the South Louisiana air to my bedroom window, out by the Petite Amite River in a place called Head of Island.

The Big Show tonight ain't The Barn, and I hope no one's "spellin' Noo Yawk" out by the weed patch, but the music's fine, and I hope you enjoy it.

It's the Revolution 21 podcast, and it's on the player at the top of this page. And it's here, too.

* * *

OH, ALMOST FORGOT about the mystery band we're featuring on Revolution 21 this week. It's Cookie & the Cupcakes, who gave us "the swamp-pop national anthem," "Mathilda." That's them in the picture atop this post.

And while we're at it . . .

Who dis?

HINT: This publicity photo is from her child-singer days. Now, she's about as famous as you can get.

Qui est dans la photo?

The band in this photograph will be featured on the next Revolution 21 podcast, to be posted tonight. Who is it?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Pokey will have to learn that nyet means nyet

WAFB television in Baton Rouge reports that former Louisiana State women's basketball coach Pokey Chatman is taking over as coach of a premier Russian pro team.

Funny, I kind of thought she might take some kind of job with the East German Olympic swim team. Shows to go 'ya.

Here's the scoop:

Former LSU Lady Tigers Head Coach Pokey Chatman has accepted a lucrative coaching position with Spartak, a professional basketball team based in Russia, WAFB's Greg Meriwether reports.

Chatman says she accepted the job Thursday and plans to begin work in October. Chatman says she will be living in Russia about six months out of the year.

Chatman resigned from LSU last March amid allegations she had an inappropriate relationship with a former player. Chatman was a highly successful and decorated coach at LSU, having taken the Lady Tigers to three consecutive Final Fours beginning in 2004.

I'm walking in Memphis, 30 years ago today

If you weren't around 30 years ago today, now you can be.

Go here, to the WMC television web site, and sit down to watch the shocking, awful news from Graceland, over on South Bellevue Boulevard. Yes, South Bellevue.

It's Aug. 16, 1977. And you . . . are there.

Speaking of bleeding Louisiana dry. . . .

Add New Orleans' racist and incompetent district attorney, Eddie Jordan, to the list of wretched politicians who not only embarrass Louisianians everywhere but bleed their constituents like nuclear leeches.

In Jordan's case, he's going to be bleeding tax money from a city that literally can't spare a dime.

But now because Jordan decided to replace a bunch of white people in the DA's office with a bunch of African-American political cronies -- for no other reason than the canned staffers were white . . . and not cronies -- either the city of New Orleans or the Louisiana Legislature is going to be on the hook for $3.5 million federal jury award. Thus sayeth a federal appeals court, as reported in today's New Orleans Times-Picayune:

A federal appeals court Wednesday upheld the verdict that Orleans Parish District Attorney Eddie Jordan violated civil rights law by firing dozens of white employees after taking office, marking the final automatic appeal of a jury award that now tops $3.5 million after accruing interest for two years.

In 2003, days after becoming the city's first black district attorney, Jordan fired dozens of longtime employees -- including clerks, typists, investigators and other support staff -- to make room for loyalists and others who worked on his campaign.

While Jordan said he was applying his political prerogative to build his own staff after taking the helm of an office led for decades by Harry Connick, a federal jury in 2005 found him liable for employment discrimination for firing all white people and replacing them with black people.

Fifth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals Judges Will Garwood, Emilio Garza and Rhesa Barksdale heard Jordan's appeal in April and ruled against him Wednesday, finding that the jury had enough evidence to determine that race was a motivating factor in firing the 43 people who later sued him. Forty-two were white and one was Hispanic.

"This was a complete vindication of the jury's verdict," said attorney Clement Donelon, who led the plaintiffs to a victory at trial. "And we are ecstatic over the decision of the 5th Circuit, which is a complete affirmation of the judgments of the trial court. Mr. Jordan's options are very, very few at this point."

The jury in U.S. District Court two years ago awarded $1.9 million in back pay and damages to 35 of the 43 former workers who sued Jordan. But interest and attorney fees, which Jordan must pay, have accumulated during the appeals process.

Unless Jordan persuades the 5th Circuit to review the case yet again, or it becomes one of the rare cases that the U.S. Supreme Court picks up in its limited scope of purely constitutional issues, the bill comes due in about three months.

Jordan was sued as the district attorney and not personally, so he must request the money from either the state Legislature or the New Orleans City Council.

"When a race discrimination claim has been fully tried, as has this one, this court need not 'parse the evidence into discrete segments,' " Barksdale wrote for the court, quoting case law. Instead, the court needed only to review whether the jury had sufficient evidence to make its decision.

The court also ordered that Jordan pay the plaintiffs' attorneys -- Donelon, Vaughn Cimini, Lisa Brener and Richard Leefe -- for the appeals process.

Jordan, through his spokesman Dalton Savwoir, said he is disappointed with the decision and will review his "appellate options."

But this was his last appeal afforded by the legal system.

At the April hearing before the 5th Circuit, Jordan enlisted two of his staff attorneys, Donna Andrieu and Graham Bosworth, to argue the case instead of the Chaffe McCall law firm's attorneys who represented him at the federal jury trial. Jordan's lead attorney at that trial was Philip Shuler.

During the hearing, Barksdale repeatedly told Jordan's prosecutors that they could not simply rehash the arguments given to the jury in 2005. The jury had already weighed and decided the racial discrimination question, the judges told Jordan's team.

Despite Jordan's insistence that he did not consider race when replacing the staff, the jury was convinced of discrimination in part by the sheer numbers presented by the plaintiffs. Within 72 days of taking office, Jordan's staff changed from 77 white people and 56 black people to 27 white people and 130 black people.

Fired along the way were 53 white people, one Hispanic and two black people. All except one investigator were replaced by black people. Of the 20 white investigators who had worked under 29-year incumbent Connick, Jordan fired all of them but retained five black investigators and hired 10 black people into the jobs.

The point was to staff his office with those who supported him, Jordan repeated throughout the case, and most happened to be African-American.

AND YET THIS CLOWN REMAINS in office, continuing to suckle at the taxpayer teat, continuing to not convict criminals, continuing to drop charges against murder suspects, continuing to point the finger of blame at anyone but himself.

Just how far gone is an electorate that's utterly incapable of getting sick and tired of being sick and tired?

Louisiana . . . a place where sociologists can make their careers.

Elvis: The way he was

Thirty years ago today, we lost "The King," Elvis Presley. Here's Elvis at his peak, in 1957 -- before the overexposure, before one too many crappy movies, before one too many peanut-butter-and-banana sandwiches, before the drugs, before Vegas.

Here is the King of Rock 'n' Roll on The Ed Sullivan Show, singing the best version of the gospel song "Peace in the Valley," well . . . ever. And The Jordanaires kick butt.

Big time.

Well, you can do what you want to us. . . .

From a yellow-dog Democrat fan back home in Louisiana:

Ladies and gentlemen, I'll be brief.

The issue here is not whether we broke a few rules or took a few liberties with our female party guests.

We did.

But you can't hold a whole fraternity responsible for the behavior of a few sick, perverted individuals.

If you do, shouldn't we blame the whole fraternity system?

And if the whole fraternity system is guilty, then isn't this an indictment of our educational institutions in general?

(Cheering)

I put it to you, Greg.

Isn't this an indictment of our entire American society?

Well, you can do what you want to us, but we won't sit here . . . and listen to you badmouth the United States of America!

Gentlemen!

(Stalking out, humming the national anthem)

OH, I'M SORRY . . . wrong indignant speech. That was from Animal House, not from Louisiana's defenders of the indefensible. Here's the faux-outraged bleat, in response to this, from one LA Media Watch (as in, "Watch for truth, squash it like a bug"):

First, as a point of reference, Bruce Fein, the constitutional lawyer who wrote the first articles of impeachment against Bill Clinton, is now also calling for the impeachment of Cheney and Bush. It is noteworthy that you have joined a chorus of many others, myself included, who believe impeachment is now a necessary course of acton, but this stance, in and of itself, does little to justify the ridiculous arguments you are leveling against Louisiana Democrats as well as the entire State of Louisiana, as you sit behind your computer in Douglas Country, Nebraska.

Ripping a page out of Ann Coulter's playbook, you have attempted to conflate the notion of loyalty or alligiance to a cause as analogous to totalitarian obedience; referencing "Nazis" and "communists" is a tired, weak, and intellectually dishonest rhetorical trope that is only employed by those who cannot withstand the rigors of a serious debate. And this is what you have done.

You have denounced those who have read and questioned Mr. Jindal's early work, yet when confronted, you attempted to scuttle the issue into an argument about your own political identity.

But what is even more insulting are your crude and reckless statements about my home, Louisiana. Your fetishization of Louisiana culture is undermined by your rabid attacks against a State that has suffered tremendous injustice at the hands of the man you would like to be impeached, President Bush. Perhaps, sitting as you are in Douglas County, it is difficult for you to empathize or even recognize the struggles this State has had to endure, but the notion that failures and shortcomings are the principal responsibility of the Louisiana Democratic Party is both vile and ignorant, displaying a predilection for selective memory. Certainly Democrats in Louisiana have engaged in corruption but so have Republicans in Louisiana and so have Democrats and Republicans in Nebraska. Those with a shred of honesty recognize this and understand corruption should not be tolerated, regardless of one's party affiliation.

Your statement about Louisiana "teetering on the cusp of oblivion" demonstrates the height of vapid, self-righteous arrogance, and it is an insult to all Louisianans, Republicans and Democrats, who are working every single day to recover and restore our State.

Sir, we are proud of our State, and though the hurricanes may have destroyed much, they did not destroy our spirit. For someone like yourself to sanctimoniously spit on us, while grandstanding about a tradition of which you obviously know nothing, is truly deplorable.

I hope you enjoyed your po boy sandwich. They're a speciality down here.

FIRST OFF, PODNA, you seem not to get that I'm a Louisianian. I was born there; I was raised there; I was educated there. I can trace half of my family tree to Louisiana when it was a Spanish colony. Some of those ancestors came from Paris, others from Quebec.

Another great-great-great-great-great grandfather -- on the other side of the family -- was otherwise occupied fighting the British in South Carolina as a captain under Gen. Francis Marion, the "Swamp Fox."

I know a hell of a lot about your "tradition," half of which is wonderful and which I miss very much. It's the other half -- the ignorant, bigoted, lazy-ass, insouciant "Id" half -- that I deplore, and from which I fled in 1988 during the oil bust.

Unfortunately, it's the Louisiana "Id" you (and your party) celebrate, and have celebrated for generations as you enable, elevate and elect grafters and incompetents that bleed and bleed and bleed my home state, all the while entrenching a culture of criminality and fatalism. A culture that tells poor and working-class Louisianians that excellence is for suckers, that the key to getting ahead is "knowing somebody."

Or bribing somebody.

The "tradition" you celebrate stares back at a state that's at the rock bottom of all the good rankings and the top of all the bad ones, and that "tradition" has the face of Edwin Edwards, now sitting in the federal pen at Oakdale. It has the face of agriculture commissioner Bob Odom, who is fighting like hell to keep out of some pen's geriatric ward. It has the face of former Edwards aide Clyde Vidrine, whose son went to my Baton Rouge school. That kid's notable quote from Broadmoor Junior High, circa 1974, was "Mr. Carlos is a nice man."

That would be Carlos Marcello, then Mafia boss of New Orleans.

That tradition you say I know nothing about stares back on the ruins of my home with the face of U.S. Rep. William "Dollar Bill" Jefferson, awaiting trial on federal bribery charges. It wears the ugly, deformed face of an endless line of lower-light Louisiana pols, overwhelmigly Democrats -- can you say Oliver Thomas? -- whose corruption and kleptomaniac ways have taken money from schools, money from roads, money from hospitals and money from the poor.

And the most damnable thing about that is your sainted "tradition" has, by and large, gotten its countless Louisiana victims to be pretty much OK with that.

Don't tell me I know nothing of your "tradition." I know too damned much about Louisiana "tradition."

About how my mother's family was dirt poor during the Great Depression. About how my grandparents got 11 of 15 kids to adulthood amid tenuous circumstances, spotty employment and a long stint as sharecroppers. Exactly one of those kids managed to graduate from what little high school Louisiana offered back then.

And local school officials didn't exactly bust a gut to ensure that my mother ever actually went to school. No, the Louisiana "tradition" was OK with her growing up illiterate because it was her lot in life to be the family flunky, working in the fields and helping raise the younger kids.

This all was accomplished with the nonexistent "help" of the state, as "good Democrats" Huey Long, O.K. Allen, Richard Leche and their ilk bled Standard Oil, only to give the people third-rate leftovers from that largesse.

People tell me that was "populism," and that that "populist legacy" is Louisiana's problem.

Me, I hardly equate operating a rump kleptocracy with populism. Populism is not addicting a whole state to the idea of something for nothing and then leaving it for bitter history to point out that you can't fool all of the people all of the time, but that Louisiana pols came close.

With every dilapidated school with pathetic test scores, with every crumbling state highway, with every politician being "perp walked" before the TV cameras, Louisianians learn that they didn't pay much for their Third World government, and they pretty much got what they paid for.

On the other hand, you could argue they've paid a lot. They've paid with the jobs that aren't there, because the employers aren't there, because too many Louisianians are too ignorant to hold jobs in the modern marketplace.

They've paid with their taxes, though they pretty much get squat for their money. They pay with a high crime rate. They pay with their humiliation as the rest of the country looks at Louisiana and laughs. That is, when they aren't looking at Louisiana with pity.

They pay in sorrow, as they watch their children -- the ones who somehow managed to prosper amid the wreckage of an education system, having navigated crumbling buildings and endured official neglect -- look around, figure "I can do better than this," and flee as soon as they're able.

They pay with the violence done to their souls and consciences amid a culture of cronyism and corruption. They pay every time they come out on the short end of "It's not what you know, it's who you know."

I TAKE IT BACK. Louisianians have paid a lot. They have gotten much in return. Much of nothing in exchange for their well being, their self-respect and their human dignity.

Furthermore, don't you DARE mau-mau me with that stuff about how Louisiana "has suffered tremendous injustice" at the hands of George W. Bush and the feds. I know that's true. You know that's true. Hell, probably even George W. Bush knows that's true.

Don't mau-mau me with that because, frankly, it doesn't matter. Get this straight . . . most Americans don't give a rat's ass that the feds have screwed you over. It's wrong, it's evil, it's not fair . . . but it is what it is.

But most of all, don't you dare hand me that fragrant load because many of the fools you so indignantly defend -- historically, overwhelmingly Democratic fools -- screwed over Louisiana first. Locals made it into the Poor Man of America, a basket-case failed state with a deeply deviant civic culture that, for all intents and purposes, wore a gigantic "KICK ME" sign as a target for Washington reprobates like Bush.

Yeah, Louisiana has been used, screwed and tattooed. But before it was a case of rape, it was a case of incest.

And now my home state has to live with that . . . or die from it.

The choice is yours.

In 'n' out of the hospital. Emphasis on the 'out'

Here's another Kristy Dusseau update from her brother Rob:

8-13-07

This morning Kristy was discharged from the hospital and was home soon after eating lunch. I spent the day before with filming while we walked around the hospital and talked. She's looking better. I'll try and get to the footage this weekend, but I may need a week or two. Sorry I have to go now. Thanks everyone for your thoughts and prayers.

DON'T FORGET KRISTY, Y'ALL. Cancer is a tough slog -- even when you're rid of it. Read more about her story (and follow the links) here.

But there's only one thing to be said about her being out of the hospital: WOO HOO!

OK, two things. Add "Thank God."

The Onion as prophecy? Go figure.

In 2005, The Onion published an article it thought was pretty hysterical satire. Yes, it was hysterical, but was it satire?

I fear we live in a satire-proof age, considering how close to reality this sendup of the RIAA's war against its customer base would end up being in 2007:

RIAA Bans Telling Friends About Songs

LOS ANGELES — The Recording Industry Association of America announced Tuesday that it will be taking legal action against anyone discovered telling friends, acquaintances, or associates about new songs, artists, or albums. "We are merely exercising our right to defend our intellectual properties from unauthorized peer-to-peer notification of the existence of copyrighted material," a press release signed by RIAA anti-piracy director Brad Buckles read. "We will aggressively prosecute those individuals who attempt to pirate our property by generating 'buzz' about any proprietary music, movies, or software, or enjoy same in the company of anyone other than themselves." RIAA attorneys said they were also looking into the legality of word-of-mouth "favorites-sharing" sites, such as coffee shops, universities, and living rooms.

HAT TIP: Radio and Internet Newsletter.

What does a bishop care if we call him Fool?

If Dutch Catholic bishops didn't exist, Satan would have to invent them.

Even in a Church whose first pope was Peter -- not the sharpest knife in the drawer -- this is truly exceptional. Bishop Tiny Muskens, of the Breda diocese in the southern Netherlands, think we all should just call God "Allah" to ease tensions with Muslims.

This is an idea so insane that even, according to a newspaper poll, 92 percent of the famously heterodox Dutch think +Delusional is full of it. According to The Associated Press:

A Roman Catholic Bishop in the Netherlands has proposed people of all faiths refer to God as Allah to foster understanding, stoking an already heated debate on religious tolerance in a country with one million Muslims.

Bishop Tiny Muskens, from the southern diocese of Breda, told Dutch television on Monday that God did not mind what he was named and that in Indonesia, where Muskens spent eight years, priests used the word "Allah" while celebrating Mass.

"Allah is a very beautiful word for God. Shouldn't we all say that from now on we will name God Allah? ... What does God care what we call him? It is our problem."

A survey in the Netherlands' biggest-selling newspaper De Telegraaf on Wednesday found 92 percent of the more than 4,000 people polled disagreed with the bishop's view, which also drew ridicule.

"Sure. Lets call God Allah. Lets then call a church a mosque and pray five times a day. Ramadan sounds like fun," Welmoet Koppenhol wrote in a letter to the newspaper.

Gerrit de Fijter, chairman of the Protestant Church in the Netherlands, told the paper he welcomed any attempt to "create more dialogue", but added: "Calling God 'Allah' does no justice to Western identity. I see no benefit in it."

A spokesman from the union of Moroccan mosques in Amsterdam said Muslims had not asked for such a gesture.

INSTEAD OF LESSENING TENSIONS, my guess is that such a hare-brained move would really hack the Dutch Muslims off, just because it is so patronizing and such a silly rip-off of their culture and religion. I know I would be furious if I were in their wooden shoes.

But what do you expect from an allegedly Catholic bishop, who allegedly believes in God . . . Allah . . . whomever, and "has raised eyebrows in the past with suggestions that those who are hungry may steal bread and that condoms should be permissible in the fight against HIV and AIDS."

Then again, asking Westerners to call the Almighty "Allah" -- as opposed to God, Dieu, Gott or Dios -- is small potatoes for someone who pretty much has used his office to tell the faithful, in effect, that "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law."

ALL IN ALL, I can't do a better job of justly ridiculing this idiot in a mitre than did Welmoet Koppenhol, a true Dutch hero. I'll repeat his great, spot-on quote from the AP article excerpt:

"Sure. Lets call God Allah. Lets then call a church a mosque and pray five times a day. Ramadan sounds like fun."

* * *
MORE ON THE STORY is here.

All you need to N.O. about LA

Well, it was Monday, so that must mean it was New Orleans Councilman Cops a Plea Day.

And whadda you know? The featured exhibit in the Louisiana Graft Hall of Fame this week is Oliver Thomas, who pleaded guilty to bribery in federal court and then resigned his council seat. He had been city council president until June, and most recently had been serving as vice president.

Vice president. How appropriate.

But, really, all you need to know about New Orleans and Louisiana is in this paragraph from The New York Times' coverage of the Crescent City's latest humiliation:

His large following was evident in the crowded federal courtroom here on Monday, where many looked on grimly as Mr. Thomas, a 13-year veteran of the City Council, stood to enter his plea in a soft voice. The crowd later applauded Mr. Thomas when he emerged from the courtroom, and a woman called out, “I’m proud of you!”

AND SHE WAS, TOO.

Oh, and here's the trenchant assessment (again, from the Times) of the G-man in charge of the thankless task of trying to clean up what Louisiana law enforcement can't . . . and doesn't particularly care to:

“It’s just brazen down here,” James Bernazzani, the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s special agent in charge, said at a news conference after Mr. Thomas entered his plea.

“In Louisiana they skim the cream, steal the milk, hijack the bottle and look for the cow,” said Mr. Bernazzani, who noted that his district ranked second in the nation in public corruption convictions and indictments — despite its relatively small population.

DEY AIN'T NO HOPE. Or so it would appear. I am sure, with more Katrina aid desperately needed, Washington is taking careful note.

And N'Awlins oughn't be holding its breath waiting for Congress to show it the money.

* * *

The Times Picayune's take on the story is here.

And columnist par excellence Chris Rose's reflections are here.

The hotly disputed 'Duh'

Only in contemporary American politics is as big a "Well, DUH!" as this too hot for all but one public official to touch.

And that "Well, DUH!" realization is that we can't keep this mess up as a society and a country and avoid following the Roman Empire into oblivion. Only the U.S. comptroller general, however, has the guts to mention Jumbo in the family room.

That probably is because he's officially non-partisan in his position and doesn't depend on lying to voters like a $20 whore lies to a john about what a real man he is. Sayeth The Financial Times:

The US government is on a “burning platform” of unsustainable policies and practices with fiscal deficits, chronic healthcare underfunding, immigration and overseas military commitments threatening a crisis if action is not taken soon, the country’s top government inspector has warned.

David Walker, comptroller general of the US, issued the unusually downbeat assessment of his country’s future in a report that lays out what he called “chilling long-term simulations”.

These include “dramatic” tax rises, slashed government services and the large-scale dumping by foreign governments of holdings of US debt.

Drawing parallels with the end of the Roman empire, Mr Walker warned there were “striking similarities” between America’s current situation and the factors that brought down Rome, including “declining moral values and political civility at home, an over-confident and over-extended military in foreign lands and fiscal irresponsibility by the central government”.

“Sound familiar?” Mr Walker said. “In my view, it’s time to learn from history and take steps to ensure the American Republic is the first to stand the test of time.”

SOUND FAMILIAR, HE ASKS? As a matter of fact, it does.

10.5% axed for Ray. Then they peed on themselves.

Pollsters, for the first time, have been able to demonstrate roughly what percentage of a state's adult population is made up of abject idiots.

In the initial test state for the psycho-demographic study, Louisiana, researchers have demonstrated that the test sample of "likely voters" contained 10.5 percent blithering idiots, who probably drool on themselves and possibly could be institutionalized under state statute. The (New Orleans) Times-Picayune has the story:

A new statewide poll in the Louisiana governor's race shows Republican candidate Bobby Jindal with a strong lead over his competitors, including one question that listed New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin in the lineup of candidates.

In a telephone poll conducted Aug. 3-6, Southern Media & Opinion Research Inc. of Baton Rouge asked 600 likely voters who among the major candidates they would vote for if the election "were held today."

Jindal, a congressman representing the 1st District, led with 63 percent, followed by state Sen. Walter Boasso, D-Arabi, with 14.3 percent, Democratic Public Service Commissioner Foster Campbell with 4.4 percent and Republican Metaire businessman John Georges with 1.3 percent.

In the poll that included Nagin, Jindal had 60.3 percent followed by Nagin with 10.5 percent, Boasso with 10 percent, Campbell with 3.3 percent and Georges with 1.5 percent. Nagin, a Democrat serving his second term as mayor, has not announced his intentions for the future.

IT'S BEEN REPORTED THAT NAGIN finds his overwhelming support among knuckle-dragging morons to be "a two-edged sword," but that it, at least, "keeps my brand name out there."

Some folks just can't get anything straight

If the folks at The Daily Kingfish think I'm a conservative who believes Bobby Jindal's religion ought not be an issue in the Louisiana gubernatorial race, can you really trust anything that blog has to say about Jindal?

Or his faith?

Or anything?

After all, if the Kingfisher can refer to your Mighty Favog this way: "A handful of conservatives are now uncharacteristically claiming that Jindal’s faith should not be an issue," it's pretty obvious that he/she/it either didn't read the Jindal post on Revolution 21's Blog for the People, didn't understand the post's plain English or is lying like a rug.

Then again, it is a political blog run by Democratic Kool-Aid quaffers, so "truth" isn't nearly so important as "smear."

FIRST, as I mentioned explicitly in my oh-so-"conservative" post, I happen to be a Democrat. And if the political hacks who run The Daily Kingfish had taken a mere 10 minutes to look at Revolution 21's Blog for the People, they quickly would realize that I'm no political conservative.

I will plead guilty to being a social conservative . . . if that's the proper term for a Roman Catholic who actually believes what his Church teaches -- all of it. And who happens to be pro-life. And who opposes the death penalty, by and large. And who is foursquare against the insane Iraq War.

But I don't think that's what the Kingfisher was getting at. He/she/it seems to think I'm a GOP shill. I'd like the Kingfisher to explain this, then.

Furthermore, if I were one of those "conservatives" who didn't want the public to read Bobby Jindal's 1994 account of an exorcism in The New Oxford Review, why in the world would I have linked to it?

My objection is that to the extent Louisiana Democrats seek to portray Jindal as unfit to govern, and indeed as nuts, based on his acceptance of things he believes in unity with the Catholic Church, that is the extent to which they will be engaging in rank religious bigotry.

Highlighting positions Jindal takes due to his Catholicism which might have negative public-policy implications -- and then straightforwardly outlining what those might be (minus the slurs and innuendo) -- would be one thing. I might not agree, but that is fair political discourse.

Implying that Jindal is a certified whackadoodle because of beliefs the Church has held for, oh, 2,000 years (and Judaism for thousands of years before that) is juvenile, hateful and sliding down the slippery slope toward David Dukeville, which is right down the road from Adolf Hitlerburg.

And if that is the Dems' intent, I think the state central committee needs to be asking some hard questions of U.S. Sen. Mary Landrieu and every other Democrat who also happens to be Catholic . . . and who, at their confirmation into the Church, made some public vows:

Bishop: Do you reject Satan and all his works and all his empty promises?
Candidates: I do.

Bishop: Do you believe in God the Father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth?
Candidates: I do.

Bishop: Do you believe in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord,
who was born of the Virgin Mary,
was crucified, died, and was buried,
rose from the dead,
and is now seated at the right hand of the Father?
Candidates: I do.

Bishop: Do you believe in the Holy Spirit,
the Lord, the giver of life,
who came upon the apostles at Pentecost
and today is given to you sacramentally in confirmation?
Candidates: I do.

Bishop: Do you believe in the holy catholic Church,
the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins,
the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting?
Candidates: I do.

Bishop: This is our faith. This is the faith of the Church. We are proud to profess it in Christ Jesus our Lord.
All: Amen.

HERE'S A NEWS FLASH, SKIPPER: Believing in the reality of Satan -- and all the evil spirits "who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls" -- is part of the package. Always has been.

Always will be.

Bobby Jindal's New Oxford Review piece merely reflects that Jindal has experienced quite directly what all Catholics are solemnly bound to believe.

So, what would be worse, those Democratic pols lying to God or, by the party's own implication, trying to fool the voters about what they themselves have publicly professed?

I think your Dems have painted themselves into a divine corner there, Kingfisher.

MEANWHILE, as the Louisiana Democrats try to illuminate Jindal's supposed demons-and-freak-show nuttiness for believing what his allegedly crazy-ass Church believes, The Daily Kingfish likewise tries to tar Jindal for supposedly violating the supposedly nutball Catholics' Official Nutball Protocol. In other words, Jindal conducted an Unauthorized Casting Out of Demons.

What isn't noted is that nobody at the prayer meeting in question ever intended to be involved with an exorcism. Wormwood just happened to appear in the midst of it. What the hell (ahem) were they supposed to do, invite the apparent satanic minion for tea and crumpets?

Furthermore, Jindal apparently was the only Catholic there. He wasn't running the show. It seems to me that, in that event, praying hard was an entirely reasonable response.

Then again, it's pretty apparent that the Louisiana Democratic Party has scant experience with reasonable responses, so it's unsurprising that The Daily Kingfish has trouble recognizing one when it reads about it.

I feel a reasonable prayer for my fellow political partisans coming on now. It was written by Pope Leo XIII at the end of the 19th century, lots and lots of Catholics say it at the end of every Mass, and it goes like this:

St. Michael the Archangel,
defend us in battle.
Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the Devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray,
and do thou,
O Prince of the heavenly hosts,
by the power of God,
thrust into hell Satan,
and all the evil spirits,
who prowl about the world
seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.

Bongos? Mais cher, ça c'est fou!

The lovely and talented Mrs. Favog and your humble correspondent took a Saturday evening drive around Little Italy, exploring all the nooks and crannies . . . all the narrow, really steep streets down by the Missouri River, all the new construction of condos and the historically appropriate new row houses where one of Omaha's venerable Italian steakhouses once stood.

If we can't have Caniglia's anymore, The Towns at Little Italy is a worthy replacement. Now, if everybody started grilling steaks all at once there one day, it might smell just the same.

I'll have the mostacholi as my side dish, please.

So -- speaking of food -- we ended up downtown at the local Louisiana-style eatery, Jazz, which is part of a Kansas City-based chain. The food is good, and pretty authentic . . . the gumbo more than passable and the fried oyster po-boys first rate. Nice and sloppy, just like I like 'em.

Now, if they could just get Abita beer up here in Huskerland. . . .

Anyway . . . we walk into Jazz to the honest-to-God chank-a-chank of a real, live Cajun band. In Omaha-by-Gawd, Nebraska. With the Sunbeam Bread and old Jax Beer signs on the wall, I could have deluded myself into thinking I was at Mulate's in Breaux Bridge, La. All that was missing was the dance floor.

And the Dixie Beer. Or the Abita Turbodog. I'm not picky.

The Omaha-based Cajun band was passable by Louisiana standards, hunky dory by Midwestern ones. For a second -- until the uttering of the words "You guys" -- I had half-convinced myself the lead singer had a faint South Louisiana accent. Somewhere between Cajun and 'Yat, as softened by professional-class Baton Rouge, if I had to place my auditory hallucination.

But it was just that. A hallucination.

And like the Las Vegas version of Paris, the Authentic Omaha Cajun Experience went a little awry when the percussionist (already a no-no if you're talking Absolutely Traditional Cajun Band) brought out bongos for a couple of numbers. It was as if Desi Arnaz had brought out a German oompa band to play Babalú.

Such is the lot of a Louisiana Boy on the cusp of the Great Plains, where people do listen to oompa bands. You notice things like bongos in a Cajun band. Sigh.

But that oyster po-boy was damn tasty. Mais cher! Ça c'est bon, oui!

If David Duke had had Photoshop. . . .

Some Democrats -- particularly in the Louisiana blogosphere -- think Bobby Jindal would make a spectacularly bad governor. That would seem to indicate they have some serious policy differences with the Republican congressman and gubernatorial front-runner.

SO WHAT BETTER WAY to illustrate substantive policy differences than to take a picture of the Vatican's chief exorcist, Father Gabriele Amorth, off the Web, then slide on over to CNN.com for a head shot of Jindal, and then fire up the Photoshop to create instant Internet intolerance?

It all hearkens back to this article in which Jindal describes an exorcism, one which Democrats have been trying to use against him since 2003. Because Jindal expresses his belief -- with his Church -- in the reality of demons, Satan and the possibility of demonic possession, left-wing bloggers in the state have deemed such acceptance of fundamental Catholic doctrine as proof that the congressman is a nut and, thus, unfit for office.

THE LOUISIANA DEMOCRATIC PARTY would appear to agree, being that it plans to run attack ads centering on Jindal's writings in Catholic publications.

In other words, the political arena is off limits to Catholics who actually believe in all that Papist s***.

So much for the First Amendment. And "diversity." And "tolerance."

The blogosphere purveyor of this latest bit of anti-Catholic mockery, Ashley Morris, seems to think that because Jindal isn't his kind of candidate, mocking the man's religious faith is fair game.

Replying to an upset reader, Morris asks:

". . . have you read the piece that Mr Jindal wrote? I am, privately, probably as religious as Mr Jindal. I do not, however, wear it on my sleeve. That piece was somewhat bizarre, you must admit.

I welcome differing points of view, when presented with good backing evidence.

I just think that Mr Jindal is very bad for Louisiana, and he would be an abysmal governor.

YEAH, HE WELCOMES those "differing points of view" -- like Jindal's, for example -- by posting mocking photo mash-ups designed to denigrate that which is precious to the "welcomed."

But why stop there? Why not just start referring to the congressman, who is of Indian descent, as Sabu the Elephant Boy? An ethnic slur is just as good as a religious one, right?

I guess that's why the Democrats most likely to be shocked, shocked by Jindal's beliefs like to refer to themselves as "progressive," eh?

"Progressive" like David Duke is progressive, if you ask me.

And if Morris, the oh-so-witty blogger, is truly "probably as religious as Mr. Jindal," he must be moonlighting as a tract writer for Jack Chick. Which not many people know, because he doesn't wear it on his sleeve.

You know who's featured on this week's show

It's that week in music history. A big anniversary.

A big one.

August 16, 1977.

Thirty years ago this coming Thursday. Good Lord. And we'll remember on this week's edition of the Revolution 21 podcast.

From Q magazine, July 2000:

18 JULY 1953: It was the best $4 investment anyone ever made. That was how much Elvis Presley paid to invent rock'n'roll.

Elvis Presley: I was drivin' a truck and I was studying to be an electrician too, you see. Well, I went in to Sun Records.

Jack Clement (assistant to Sun Records owner Sam Phillips): Sun was just a place that was a lot more experimental than most. I think that is the main thing that made it happen. It was just the only place them weirdo could go/

Jud Phillips (vice president, Sun Records): He was just a long-haired kid who used to hang around the corner drug store. When Elvis came into our studio, It was little more than a glorified barn, he wanted to cut a private disc for his mother's birthday.

Marion Keisker (secretary, Memphis Recording Service): It was a busy Saturday afternoon. The office was full of people wanting to make personal records. He came in, said he wanted to make a record. I told him he'd have to wait and he said OK. He sat down.
While he was waiting, we had a conversation. He said he was a singer. I said, "What kind of singer are you?" He said, "I sing all kinds." I said,"Who do you sound like?" He said,"I don't sound like nobody."

Jud Phillips: My brother Sam met him and was quite impressed with his performance, although with that long hair and old blue jeans he looked pretty wild.

Sam Phillips (co-owner Memphis Recording Service): I was in the control room. The only two thing I heard Elvis do when he came in was My Happiness and this Ink Spots thing[That's When Your Heartaches Begin].

Elvis Presley: There was a guy there that took down my name and told me he might call me sometime.

Jud Phillips: After he'd sung his song, for which we charge $4 for recording, we said maybe we'd call him over sometime to cut a commercial disc. He didn't seem too enthusiastic, but I think that was because he wasn't at all sure of his own ability.

Sam Phillips: I wrote his name down, how to get hold on him, and put it on the little old spindle upfront as we were going out of the door.

26 JUNE 1954: Sam Phillips rings Presley and invites him to Sun Studio to make a professional recording.

Marion Keisker (secretary, Memphis Recording Service): Almost a year after Elvis recorded My Happiness, Sam got all excited about a new song he'd found, but couldn't find anyone to sing.

Sam Phillips: I'd run across a ballad [Without You] written by a prisoner in the Tennessee state pen and I wanted a crooner.

Marion Keisker: I mentioned Elvis to him again.

Elvis Presley: "You want to make some blues?" he suggested over the phone, knowing I'd always been a sucker for that kind of jive. He mentioned Big Boy Crudup's name, and maybe others too/ All I know is, I hung up and ran 15 blocks to Mr. Phillips' office before he'd gotten off the line.

4 JULY 1954: Presley rehearses at Sun Studios with Scotty Moore and Bill Black.

Marion Keisker: We got Elvis to come in, but he couldn't do the song to satisfy Sam. That might have been the end of it, but something stirred Sam's interest.

Jud Phillips (co-owner, San Records): That session turned out to be a mighty frustrating business. He wasn't happy with any of the songs we suggested. Nothing we tried seemed to fit his style.

Sam Phillips: Elvis toyed around with it. I decided he needed a couple pf good rhythm men back of him so I called Scotty [Moore, guitarist] and told him to get hold of Bill [Black, bassist]. And I said, "Now, I've got a young man and he's different," I told him and Bill to go by and work with Elvis a little. I said, "Now, he's really nervous and timid and extremely polite."

5 JULY 1954: Presley records That's All Right, Mama, at Sun Records.

Scotty Moore (guitarist): It was just an audition. That's the only reason there was just Bill Black and myself in the studio. We just needed enough music to see what Elvis sounded like on tape, 'cause the first recording he did was on acetate. Sam was trying to get a line on his voice. Did he sing this kind of song or tempo better?

We tried four songs. I Love You Because was the first thing we put on tape. We were used to playing with more musicians involved, y'know. Whether it was country, pop or whatever - you had a piano player, a sax, a fiddle and so on. When we lucked in on that, I realized I was putting everything I knew into practically every song, trying to play some rhythm, some lead, fill notes, y'know. The first two or three things were put on tape when we were strictly just doodling, looking for a sound.

Elvis Presley: This song popped into my mind that I had heard years ago, and I started kidding around with it.

Jud Phillips: It was an old rhythm and blues number called That's All Right, Mama, and at once things started going right.

Scotty Moore: We were taking a break and, all of sudden, Elvis started singing this song, jumping around and acting the fool. Then Bill Black picked up his bass and began acting the fool too, and I started playing with them. Sam had the door to the control room open, and stuck his head out and said, "What are you doing?" We said, "We don't know." He said, "Well, back up. Try to find a place to start, and do it again."

So we kinda talked it over and figured out a little bit what we were doin'. We ran it again, and of course Sam is listenin'. 'Bout the third or fourth time through, we just cut it. It was basically a rhythm record. It wasn't any great thing. It wasn't Sam tellin' him what to do. Elvis was joking around, just doing what come naturally, what he felt.

Sam Phillips: I said, "Right then, that's it!" I knew we had it.

AND, AS ALWAYS, don't forget that The Big Show is only half of the Revolution 21 experience. So go to www.revolution21.org tout de suite!