If you swing by the Pep Boys on Baldwin in Freeport, N.Y., the bikini-clad lady in the hot dog truck will show you her weenies, and that's OK.
But the long arm of the law on Long Island has a big problem if you return the favor to 45-year-old Catherine Scalia . . . and thus she ended up pleading guilty Tuesday to misdemeanor prostitution, which she instead insisted was merely indecent exposure.
Nude conduct, as it were.
Thus we have the remarkable case in which Lana Lee -- not Ignatius J. Reilly -- ends up hawking Lucky Dogs, but gets into trouble when one transaction ends up being for a Night of Joy. But the saddest thing about the whole thing is not having Burma Jones there to narrate.
Now where's my soiled bedsheet? We need a good banner. How about this? "Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their weenies!"
I shall dub this movement the Crusade for Frankish Dignity. Hot-dog lovers of Long Island! Listen to the voice of the oppressed:
“I’m a mother of four kids and, yes, I show my cleavage," Scalia said. "I think it’s sexy. If Pamela Anderson can do it, so can I.”