And that's the way it @#$%*&!!! is . . . .

Alrighty, folks. This is your NSFW video of the day.

Here, at wits' end dealing with a producer back at the station, British reporter Jonathan Pie gives us the real news. Which is a lot closer to the truth than the "official" news.

"Jonathan Pie," alas, is really comedian Tom Walker, as reported by the Russian-government website Sputnik News. Which is just as well, I suppose. Pity the real TV journalist who gets fed up and tells the unvarnished truth . . . and then has the outtake go viral.

Now, what I'd like to see is a real newscast by American and Russian anchors who get good and cranky, then cut the official propaganda of each superpower to shreds . . . thereby arriving at something like the truth.

3 Chords & the Truth: Is this thing on?

We almost interrupt this program due to technical difficulties.

Almost.

It's a little late this go around, but 3 Chords & the Truth is here . . . and the music is good. Really good.

IN A FEW instances, as usual, your mind will be blown by the latest edition of the Big Show. Take safety precautions to prevent ill effects similar to those occurring when the Adobe Audition audio editor comes in contact with the latest Mac OS, El Capitan.

In short, your mental state could resemble Donald Trump's hair.

Be prepared. Be safe. Hold on.

COME TO think of it, we are on, right?

Testing. Testing. One, two, three, four, five. . . . Testing.

Whew! I was worried there for a second. Carry on.

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

3 Chords & the Truth: Hep to the jive

Don't be a wet blanket, pally. Get hep to the 3 Chords & the Truth Fan Club and never miss another jivin' tune again.

All you have to do to be with the swingin' crowd is become a regular listener of the Big Show. And the best thing about it is that you get the whole wide world of solid sounds for exactly nothin'.

That's right, won't cost you a thin dime, Ain't no better bargain than free, buddy boy.

So join all the cool kids in the 3 Chords & the Truth appreciation society and hear everything from the Syndicate of Sound to Southern Culture on the Skids. From She & Him to Dale & Grace.

And that ain't the half of it, Daddy-O.

SIGN ON with the Big Show, and you get some bonus Otis Redding and Shawn Mullins for a small shipping and handling charge. That would be your undying devotion, sister. Or brother. Either way, man -- it's copacetic.

Oh, the things you'll hear!

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there.  Aloha.

If you or a loved one has been hurt by Leonard Fournette. . . .

I don't care who ya' are, this is funny.

In a related class-action development, I understand that pursuers who inhale the dust in Leonard Fournette's wake also may be at high risk for mesothelioma. If you or some linebacker you love develops mesothelioma after playing football against LSU and Leonard Fournette call State, War Eagle and Orangemen at 1 (800) TOO SLOW.

Geaux Tigers!

3 Chords & the Truth: Drop the needle

 
I've got a phonograph, and I'm not afraid to use it. Don't mess with me.

Man, that kind of sums up the whole of 3 Chords & the Truth, doesn't it?

Actually, I've got more than a few phonographs, and I use 'em plenty. That's where the bulk of the music on the Big Show comes from -- musical gems I've had forever, and treasures I've dug up at estate sales, thrift shops, used-record bins and elsewhere all over creation.

A lot of it you're not going to find on the Internet or on CD. So if you want to hear a lot of this stuff. . . .

For instance, remember Lou Bega's big hit from 1999, "Mambo No. 5"? Well, this week, you're going to hear the original by Perez Prado and His Orchestra from way back in the day. If you ask me, Prado's version swings a lot harder than the 1990s iteration.

OTHERWISE on 3 Chords & the Truth this week, your Mighty Favog has . . .

A little bit of Stafford in my life, a little bit of Van Damme by her side

A little bit of Cugat is all I need, a little bit of Dusty is what I see

A little bit of the Moodies in the sun, a little bit of Nick Lowe all night long

A little bit of Root Boy here I am, a little bit of Stan Getz is my plan.

Get the drift?

No? Let me elaborate.

A little bit of Arlo in my life, a little bit of Crenshaw by my side

A little bit of Elgart is all I need, a little bit of J-Cash is what I see

A little bit of Pozo in the sun, a little bit of Seco all night long

A little bit of Prado here I am, a little bit of you makes me your man.

BELIEVE ME, you ain't heard nothing like this.

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

How your hi-fi stereo record works

Click on the picture for larger, readable view

This afternoon's vintage-LP listening comes with a technical note.

And our tech talk today centers on a question: You ever wonder how stereo records put the stereo on the record?

Well, the top photo of the inner sleeve of our 1958 release by David Carroll and His Orchestra explains how the modern marvel of stereophonic records work. And it also contains a caveat for the stereo newbie, as nearly everyone was 57 years ago -- do not play this thing on a monophonic record player.

A mono cartridge on your mono phonograph will tear this sucker up.

See the explanation on the record sleeve for why that is.

3 Chords & the Truth: Twice as nice

It's a twin-spin weekend on 3 Chords & the Truth!

That's right, you hip, happenin' and now music fans, we're staring off this week's episode of the Big Show with artists so nice, you've got to hear 'em twice. And I'm also going to play you the 1966 Petula Clark album cut that I think should have been a single, because it's that good.

Of course, there were one or two more album cuts on her My Love LP that also should have been hit singles, but you can't play 'em all. Well, I suppose I could, but I restrained myself. I'm a professional.

And that's just the first music set this go around on 3 Chords & the Truth. There's so much more good stuff on the rest of the program, you just can't imagine.

WELL, if you're a regular listener to the best musical spot on the Internet, you can imagine. But saying that doesn't work as well rhetorically, so just go with me here.

So sit down, grab a snack and a drink, and treat yourself to an hour and a half of music-media bliss. If you don't, you'll just be cheating yourself.

Trust me on this.

So, without taking up more time reading that you should spend listening. . . .

IT'S 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

Vintage LP du jour

 

On the menu tonight at La Maison de Trois Chords is The Friends of Distinction's Real Friends album, a nice 1970 vintage for our listening pleasure.

Not only does it feature one of my all-time favorite songs, "Love or Let Me Be Lonely," it also sounds better than many new albums right out of the shrink wrap, even though this particular LP left its shrink wrap around 1970.

DO YOU THINK I still could get me a "Complete RCA Catalog" if I mailed a quarter to Dept. C, Rockaway, New Jersey 07866?

On the other hand, maybe I can dig out the Complete RCA Catalog that I did get for 25 cents back then.

Once a geek, always a geek.

That is all.

3 Chords & the Truth: The horror

It was the worst of times. It was the worst of times.

Aye, it is true that we see through a glass darkly. But sometimes, it is too dark to even see the glass.

That's the theme of this week's 3 Chords & the Truth. No, this isn't the kind of program that tries to fool you into thinking it's sunny all the time.

But this is the kind of program that tries to lift your soul even while we're trying to make you think about some stuff that maybe you'd rather not. Sometimes, thinking can be entertaining, too.

Nevertheless, there will be no pledge-week hard sell after the Big Show. Perhaps there would be if we had a pledge week -- but we don't. You can put your credit card away.

SO this week, events have pushed us into thoughtfulness, if not out-and-out solemnity . . . though there's a touch of that, too. As we put this week's show together, it's the 14th anniversary attacks on New York and Washington, and that's plenty of reason to reflect on a lot of things. A few of those things make it into the show, for your reflection and, one hopes, edification.

Also as we wrap up another edition of 3 Chords & the Truth, we've just finished watching the remastered, 25th-anniversary edition of The Civil War on that channel that does have pledge breaks. It seems to me that that's food for plenty of thought, too, in this summer of controversy over Confederate symbolism and monuments. Thus, a Civil War set . . . submitted for your approval.

Lest I start to bog you down right here in the description of the podcast, I'll just stop my touting right here and humbly ask you to set aside a spare 91 minutes and 15 seconds and listen to the thing. I don't think you'll be sorry you did.

And you may even be ecstatic that you did. So listen. Click the player or the link and have at it.

IT'S 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.