Donald Trump is autographing bibles in Alabama.
Well, of course he is. Hell has been frozen over for some time now -- and so has Omaha, by God, Nebraska.
Pardon us at 3 Chords & the Truth for being sick and tired of this crap. Winter. Ecclesiastical Lent piled on top of zeitgeist Lent. Winter. A world gone mad. Winter. . . .
You get the drift. Both kinds.
This week on the Big Show, we're muddling through and making the best of things. It's all anyone can do.
YEP, we got the good music, we're hanging onto it tight, and that will have to suffice.
I regret that my Seasonal Affective Disorder prevents me from elucidating further. My bad.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
There's weather comin'! And we're all gonna die!
So . . . before the blizzard hits us here in Omaha, by God, Nebraska, we're going to put one hell of a fine edition of 3 Chords & the Truth up here on the Internets. We intend to go out with a bang.
And as the snowy death envelops us on the Great Plains, we also intend to drink beer and eat gumbo. I am from south Louisiana, and that's how we roll when nature turns against us and venturing outside would not be the smart thing to do.
What would be the smart thing to do if weather's comin' where you are, too, would be to follow our lead at the Big Show and put on a pot of gumbo for yourself, too, and make sure you're well stocked with something to drink, as it were. The music . . . that we have covered for you.
That seems to cover it. Now we hunker down and wait for doom. Or gumbo.
One or the other -- perhaps both. Because weather's comin'.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Emergencies are bustin' out all over, and we have our own here at 3 Chords & the Truth.
God help us all.
Due to the crises facing us here and nationally, I shan't take much time to describe this week's edition of the Big Show. There are bigger fish to fry.
Of course, we don't actually know much about the ramifications of the emergency at hand, except that we damn well have one . . . and that it will severely impact the 3C&T way of life. We here at the program will continue to play fine music so that we remain calm and carry on.
THE IMPORTANT thing to remember is (insert word salad here).
And that's why it is so crucial that we have such an outlet as the Big Show to purvey the finest in eclectic, classic and progressive programming to the greater community and the world -- especially as we face these difficult times.
Etcetera, etcetera, blah bla-blah bla-blah blah blah.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
There's magic in the air -- it's almost Christmas, then there's the magic of the radio. On the Internet.
On a podcast that remembers the magic of radio and the magic of those Christmases of long-ago youthful exuberance.
On this edition of 3 Chords & the Truth, we remember the magic. We bring the magic. You just listen and see . . . hear . . . whatever. Magic and a couple of curveballs -- how's that for a description of this week's show?
This week's Big Show.
Geez, how many ways can we say "It's great!" It's like being in junior high and trying to hit that magic 500-word benchmark for an in-class essay. Junior high . . . when we were young and exuberant.
But not about in-class 500-word essays. Yuck.
Well, the show's magic, we're simply having a wonderful Christmastime, and I've officially run out of literary bovine fertilizer. This, my friend, will have to do.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
We may do more than speak anachronism around here.
This week on the Big Show, the closest we actually come to "the NOW sound" is a new record from someone who's been in the music biz as long as I've been alive. Note: That's a looooooonng time.
Otherwise, we have some 78s, some old LPs and some 45s that go back to the genesis of the format. Which was at least a couple of generations removed from how folks get their music now.
At least.
WE SPEAK anachronism -- hell, we live anachronism around here -- because apart from liking it, there seems to be less and less percentage in the present. And sometimes you just need a reprieve from it.
OK, 3 Chords & the Truth needs frequent reprieves from the present . . . the eternal NOW. Give us some good, old-fashioned Then now and again. And again. And again.
Anachronism, c'est nous.
Embrace anachronism. It's good.
AND, while I'm thinking of it, the tasty Christmas tunes continues apace this week on the program as we try to make the season bright. And hot chocolate, pepperminty, candy cane-y.
So it's ho-ho-ho . . . and on with the show.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
In 1961, I was born into a society and a state run by preening, fascist jackasses who weaponized bigotry and hatred as a means of governance and civic intimidation. Such was the Deep South under Jim Crow.
In middle age, I find myself living in a society and -- now -- an entire country run by preening, fascist jackasses who weaponize bigotry and hatred as a means of governance (such as it is) and civic intimidation. Such is the whole damn country under Trumpism.
Forget two steps forward and one step back. Try two steps forward, then 60 years back.
This week's episode of 3 Chords & the Truth comes at the end of a particularly ugly week in American history -- this by the prevailing standards of a time in American history when every week is an ugly week presided over by a president who is the Pied Piper of Pathology. The Duke of Deviance. The Count of Cruelty.
And he has a trail of toilet paper stuck to his goddamn shoe.
Or the soiled, tattered souls of Republican senators. One or the other.
THIS UGLY WEEK featured the slut shaming of victims of sexual assault. The ridiculing of a woman who had given credible testimony that a nominee for the Supreme Court had tried to rape her when they were in high school.
It also featured a sham FBI investigation of that accusation and others against Brett Kavanaugh. Did we know enough to say for sure what happened? No.Was there enough smoke to logically assume something was fully engulfed in flame? You bet.
Did congressional Republicans care? Of course not.
Does it look like the United States is coming apart at a level not seen since 1968 -- and perhaps since 1861? Looks like it from here in Omaha, by God, Nebraska.
This is the week we wish wasn't, and this is a week when we're -- somehow -- supposed to do another episode of the Big Show. Remember the Big Show? Yeah. It's easy to forget in times like these.
THE PROBLEM in doing yet another episode of 3 Chords & the Truth when shit gets exponentially weirder with each passing week is the specter of overwhelming cognitive dissonance. You start to feel like you're returning to regularly scheduled programming in Detroit as the Motor City burns around you in the spring of 1967.
Or, more in keeping with my personal frame of reference, you're the overnight man at Loose Radio in Baton Rouge, La., playing hippie, trippy rock 'n' roll music in 1971 while the rednecks from the end of Easy Rider keep circling the block, shotgun barrel pointed out the window of the pickup truck.
At you.
It occurs to me there's only one thing to do in such a situation . . . in this present situation. What do you do? What you do is give the f***ers the finger and keep playing the tunes. In the ruins.
Amen.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
This is the episode of 3 Chords & the Truth where we look at the whole flippin' world of radio, both on the Internets and online, and tell it to just hold our damn beer.
Because we're gonna show our true colors on the Big Show. All of 'em. Many of them in the same set of music.
This is not something you would hear on your local commercial radio station. This is something you'd hear on vanishingly few non-commercial radio stations.
This is something you hear all the time on 3 Chords & the Truth.
That's about all I have to say . . . HEY! I TOLD YOU TO HOLD MY DAMNED BEER, NOT SPILL IT!!!
Y'all, I gotta go. I have to fetch what's left of my beer. You can't trust most of the radio world to do anything.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Injury a head who knew you could from reading the news get?
Certainly not your Mighty Favog.
Scones!
Week this on Chords 3 Truth & the, think I we have a jolly show good. Fun we are having with plenty fun of music.
And . . . sure (the royal) we are that play we will some favorites of your. That's plenty reason to sit yourself down, click on the link, and listen to some music right now. The Big Show on. Is what we're saying.
Are we playing Pink Floyd's "Brain Damage"? Well, no, not this week. Why do you ask?
It's the great show. It's the best show. It's the unequaled show in all the universe.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Scones!
Hot town, summer in the city . . .
Back of my neck getting dirty and gritty
Been down, isn't it a pity
Doesn't seem to be a shadow in the city
All around, people looking half dead
Walking on the sidewalk, hotter than a match head
But at night it's a different world
Go out and find a girl
Come-on come-on and dance all night
Despite the heat it'll be alright
And babe, don't you know it's a pity
That the days can't be like the nights
In the summer, in the city . . .
In the summer, in the city . . . .
The Lovin' Spoonful
IT'S 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
It's a #𝛺*‡@µ%$! blast furnace out there.
If it's okey dokey with you, me am gonna stay in the semi-air conditioned 3 Chords & the Truth studio here in Omaha, by God, Nebraska and just play some music for you. S'alright?
S'alright.
That's about it. Too hot to think clearly. Run n i n g o u t o f s t e a m. (Thud.)
But we do have a nifty 1971 set and a long-distance dedication from way on the other side of the world this week. So stay tuned for that.
All in all, despite the horrible heat, a pretty dang good week on the Big Show.
So, as we always say . . . .
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
It's the Big Show, y'all. Stay tuned for a new edition this week.
Be there.
Aloha.
Let's play a game.
Chuck, Chuck bo-buck, banana fanna fo f . . . .
Uh, let's play another game. Let's play Psych-Out here on the Big Show and try to identify the sound of green. This should be a blast, man.
How we play Psych-Out is we play a bunch of far-out music, man, and we try to figure out what sounds like green . . . man. Come on, dude. This should be groovy.
We'll start you off with a mellow one, in three . . . two . . . one . . . .
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Maaaaan.
Kyrie eleison, down the road that I must travel.
Christe eleison, it's my birthday.
Kyrie eleison, I am freakin' old.
Lord have mercy, if I have to turn what I'm turning, the Big Show is gonna party like it's 1979. Or 1980.
Perhaps, 1985.
WHATEVER. No matter the particular year, this edition of 3 Chords & the Truth is going to rock.
Hard.
Christ have mercy, the old farts will rock. Yes we will. And so will you, Cap.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
The president is said to be branching out from Fox & Friends, and that means all media -- for easy comprehension -- are being required to employ Trumplators. This program is no exception.
We at 3 Chords & the Truth have learned, and learned the hard way, that Trumplation can be a fraught affair. And during the course of this rather jazz-centric edition of the show, some quick conclusions may be drawn about Trumplators and their inherent biases, ideologies and -- alas -- not-so-benign agendas.
To wit:
1. Never trust a Trumplator.
2. Never trust a Trumplator.
3. The Trumplator is not worthy of your trust.
4. Bad things will happen if you trust the Trumplator.
5. Do not assume that the Trumplator is translating for the president what you actually are saying.
6. Something ain't right in this whole deal.
7. I do not believe that Trumplators particularly like America or "decadent" American music.
8. Everybody in this whole Trumplation thing is up to something.
9. It is possible to do an excellent edition of the Big Showsky . . . uh . . . Big Show despite the mandated Trumplator causing all hell to break loose.
10. DO NOT trust the Trumplator, comrade.
That's about it.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Here's what we're going to do this week on the Big Show: First of all, we're going to tune in.
Then we will turn on, maaaaan.
Finally, we will rock out. It's as simple as that.
Oh . . . we may end up jazzing out some, too. But we definitely will rock out.
Is what I'm saying.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
groovy adj. \ ˈgrü-vē \
groovier; grooviest
1 : marvelous, wonderful, excellent
"If you really want to hear something really groovy on the Internet, check out 3 Chords & the Truth."
2 : hip, trendy
A more enjoyable and groovier listening experience -- that's what the Big Show is.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Groovy.
This jive, that jive . . . we're hep to all that jive, Daddio. And Mama.
We live in a jive country in a jive world, and we're swingin' to some solid sounds on the Big Show this week -- and every week. What more can I say?
Well, I don't know, either.
So I guess we're cool on the content of the lil' hepcat hop we like to call 3 Chords & the Truth. Uh . . . we like to call it that, because that's its name.
But if you just want to call it the Serenade of Solid Sounds, you could do that, too. We're not picky.
Just so long as the good music drowns out the clunker notes of whatever lame tune the rest of the world is playing right now.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
There's no future, no future, no future for Welk. Or is there?
That is the existential question we face this week on 3 Chords & the Truth.
The other day, if you've been hanging around these climes, you may have met Sheena. Sheena was a punk rocker. Now, Sheena's a mom with a problem.
As we learned then:
You've put safety pins in all the right places. Your hair is perfectly spiked. You have all your favorite punk rock albums in hand, and now you're heading for your brand-new Stereo Theater home-entertainment center.
And what do you find? Judy and little Jeffy are watching reruns of the Lawrence Welk Show on public television. "F*@# THAT S#!%!" your mind is screaming as you set the LPs on the kitchen table and check on the popovers you've got in the Magic Maid oven.
It's a dilemma. You believe in your children's right to explore -- to
even embrace -- new ideas, no matter how bizarre or radical. Even when it's the Lawrence Welk Show. After all, you experimented with Welk back in high school, and it's not like you became an addict or anything. BUT . . . BUT . . . YOU JUST WANT TO SIT BACK AND LISTEN TO YOUR OLD CLASH AND SEX PISTOLS RECORDS, DAMMIT!
It Just Isn't. Fair.
You pensively tug on the safety pin in your cheek -- OUCH!-- as you
take a pull on your fifth of Early Times. There must be a reasonable way to untangle this musical disconnect threatening to pull apart your family.
And the ladies in the PTA definitely frown upon child murder.
What to do?
WELL, here's what you do. You listen to this week's edition of the Big Show. It is here that we bridge the gap, learn the young'uns and remind us old'uns about the central truth of this here program.
There's only two kinds of music: good and bad. The bad, we don't mess with.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
Listen, my friends.
I have something important to tell you.
Listen, my friends.
It's a matter of life and death.
Listen, my friends.
If you listen to the Big Show now . . .
Listen, my friends . . .
You won't be able to hear the voices in Himself's head.
Listen, my friends.
One thing's better than the others.
LISTEN, my friends.
And it's 3 Chords & the Truth out of Omaha.
Listen, my friends.
There's madness afoot in Washington and across the nation.
Listen, my friends.
It's important to drown it out.
Listen, my friends.
There's good music here, and only noise there.
Listen, my friends.
There's beauty in the songs.
Listen, my friends.
The noise surrounding us is so ugly.
Listen, my friends.
Music keeps it away.
Just listen, my friends. The sanity you save may be your own.
It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.
