The waning days of Christmas

Around here at least, Christmas fades but is not gone.

We're Catholic. Christmas ain't over until Sunday, with the feast of The Baptism of the Lord. The tree stays until then.

I'm dreaming of a white, feathered Christmas

It may not be a Christmas miracle, but it's close enough.

This morning, I awoke to a) the white Christmas -- the very white Christmas, as it turns out -- we weren't supposed to have this year and b) an extremely excited spousal unit telling me there was a flock of turkeys in the front yard.

All told, there were seven gobblers out there. I think I'll have an extra little smile on my face this afternoon for the Making of the Christmas Gumbo.

Ho! Ho! Ho! And a very merry Christmas to one and all.

3 Chords & the Truth: Put a bow on it

It's the day before Christmas and all through this space, gorgeous music fills every little place.

Not a discordant note will be found on the show . . . not a stinker or a clunker or a misplaced fanfare.

3 Chords & the Truth has been uploaded with care, and if you love Christmas music, there's no cause to despair.

The Big Show nestles sweetly in your ear, and  good cheer will carry you to the New Year.

And out on the Internet you'll hear clever patter, and all the fine tunes that we can gather.

ON AARON, on Harry, on Tony and Bing . . . on with the songs that you sing! To the top of the charts, to the heights of our culture!

Spread holiday cheer . . . joy you will nurture!

Etcetera and so on, this poem grows more tortured. Lo, I'm painting myself into a corner!

So dash away, dash away, dash away all! Seek out the Big Show, oh, answer my call!

That's it . . . I'm done . . . no more shall I write. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

3 Chords & the Truth: Tunes and egg nog

Listen, it's almost Christmas. Give your brain a rest, your ears a treat and your egg-nog receptors what is necessary at this time of the year.

No, this isn't the official Christmas episode of 3 Chords & the Truth, but we're getting there. This is the warm-up episode for the Yuletide edition, but it's right nice in its own way.

That is why your Mighty Favog strongly recommends that you de-stress, chill out, don't think (too much, at least) and let the music wash over you this holiday season.

And that's  how we warm up for the big Christmas edition of the Big Show just days away from the event.

TRUST ME. You're gonna love the show this week.

And you're really gonna love it next week.

And if you haven't listened to the last show (or three), you'll bloody well love them, too.

So just do it. Egg nog. Good music. Chill . . . in a warm and cozy way.

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

3 Chords & the Truth: Dead on target

This week on the Big Show, we take dead aim on who and what we are as Americans.

And I think we've picked some songs that hit the target.

Of course 3 Chords & the Truth, hits the musical bullseye every week, but this episode draws a bead on something specific about American culture these days. Something we just love to death.

Or is it that we love death? Oh, well. Whatever.

ALSO ON the program this week, we have a little of this and a little of that, and we also start rolling out the Christmas music now that we have achieved bleak midwinter-ish.

And that's all we have to say about that. The Big Show, that is.

So. . . .

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

This was the week that was

Enough said.

Nothing says 'Merry Christmas' like a good brawl

The Mormons must be thrilled by that sucker punch by BYU defensive back Kai Nacua. Uh . . . yeah.
 
Where's Robert Earl Keen when you need him to write a Christmas song about this.

3 Chords & the Truth: Merry Christmas!

I could tell you all about how much of this special Christmas edition of 3 Chords & the Truth has its genesis in thrift stores, estate sales, hand-me-downs and family treasures.

(Answer: A lot.)

I guess, too, that I could tell you all about turning lost audio history into modern Big Show podcastery.

(Interesting stuff if you're as big a geek as your Mighty Favog.)

Or perhaps I could tell you about the amazing, tuneful Christmas party inside the 3 Chords & the Truth studio . . . and now just a click away from being inside your favorite audio device. Which makes it just a click away from putting a big smile on your face.

(Would that be too immodest? Too much like a TV infomercial or something equally unauthentic?)

OF COURSE, I could just say that the expanded Christmas edition of the Big Show is really, really good this year.

(WARNING! WARNING! Bragging detected. Ego suppression activating in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . . .)

On the other hand, perhaps I'll just repeat a beautiful passage given to us long ago. It tells why we celebrate . . . why we are filled with joy in the remembering:

1 And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed.

2 (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)

3 And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.

4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)

5 To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.

6 And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.

7 And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

8 And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

9 And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.

12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,

14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

15 And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us.

16 And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.

17 And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child.

18 And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

19 But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.

20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

21 And when eight days were accomplished for the circumcising of the child, his name was called JESUS, which was so named of the angel before he was conceived in the womb.

22 And when the days of her purification according to the law of Moses were accomplished, they brought him to Jerusalem, to present him to the Lord;

23 (As it is written in the law of the Lord, Every male that openeth the womb shall be called holy to the Lord;)

24 And to offer a sacrifice according to that which is said in the law of the Lord, A pair of turtledoves, or two young pigeons.

25 And, behold, there was a man in Jerusalem, whose name was Simeon; and the same man was just and devout, waiting for the consolation of Israel: and the Holy Ghost was upon him.

26 And it was revealed unto him by the Holy Ghost, that he should not see death, before he had seen the Lord's Christ.

27 And he came by the Spirit into the temple: and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to do for him after the custom of the law,

28 Then took he him up in his arms, and blessed God, and said,

29 Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace, according to thy word:

30 For mine eyes have seen thy salvation,

31 Which thou hast prepared before the face of all people;

32 A light to lighten the Gentiles, and the glory of thy people Israel.

33 And Joseph and his mother marvelled at those things which were spoken of him.

34 And Simeon blessed them, and said unto Mary his mother, Behold, this child is set for the fall and rising again of many in Israel; and for a sign which shall be spoken against;

35 (Yea, a sword shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.

THAT, FRIEND, is reason for a party. Two millennia ago, hope came to a hopeless world, and the darkness shall prevail not.

Merry Christmas . . . and party on.

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Aloha.

Viral police videos we like to see

And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

John 1:5

A Christmas Hallelujah

3 Chords & the Truth: It's a party!

I'm just gonna say it. I'm just gonna put it out there . . . the heck with modesty.

This year's yuletide edition of 3 Chords & the Truth is the most fun you can have at a Christmas party without bare butts and photocopiers being in the mix.

And the Big Show is a party -- every week, yes, but especially for every year's Christmas edition. This year is no exception. Great music, great times, great program.

By the way, don't ask about the big smudge on the office Xerox machine. Trust me on this one.

It's 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Alo-ho-ho-ho-ha.

And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.

Deck the halls with ginned-up outrage

If somebody had to say it, chances are that Jon Stewart just did.

"Uff course Kris Kringle iss vhite!"

A Festivus pole made out of beer cans at the Florida state capitol? That I find hilarious.

Fox News cynically using the commemoration of the Savior's birth to manufacture outrage, ill will and hatred of one's fellow man? That is as truly disturbing as it is completely predictable.

The TV gathering spot for pissed-off people on the political right might have "news" as part of its name, but it seems to have a lot more in common with Joseph Goebbels than it does with Edward R. Murrow.

The cynicism on display by Fox News regarding "the war on Christmas" is astounding, coming as it is from people casually cashing in on the sacred as they appeal to the worst demons of their viewership.

Sequester, bane of man's inspiring

You can look at this video of a glorious flash mob by the The United States Air Force Band a couple of ways.

First, the pop-up Christmas concert at the National Air and Space Museum was a glorious thing -- an unexpected musical encounter with beauty and joy. If this version of Bach's "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring" doesn't move your heart, you may not have one.

Second, The USAF Band has been reduced to staging flash mobs. Thank your local member of Congress for that. It's too bad ol' Johann Sebastian never wrote a little something called the "Sequester Blues."

Ironically, it's those same trolls who befoul the U.S. Capitol who are most likely to see a performance of this scale by a military band. In the federal universe, Washington, D.C., is the center of gravity -- or, if you like, the black hole that sucks everything toward itself.

Still, even in Washington, a military orchestra has to resort to a flash mob. The sequester forbids the armed services from spending any of its own money on promotional or "community-outreach" events. This means that if you're a fan of service bands, you're seriously out of luck out here in the provinces.

Last year's Heartland of America Band concert

IN OMAHA, the annual holiday concert by the Air Force's Heartland of America Band, based at Offutt Air Force Base here, used to be a glorious thing. For us and our friends, it was a Christmas tradition. In recent years, budget cuts shrank . . . and shrank . . . and shrank the band. This year, the sequester killed the Christmas concert.

A 26-year tradition of downtown Omaha holiday concerts by the Air Force's Heartland of America Band will end this year, a victim of federal budget cuts.

The Omaha World-Herald had sponsored the popular series each year since 1987, giving away free tickets to readers who sent in coupons clipped from the newspaper.

But the rules of the budget sequestration forbid the service branches from spending any money on promotional or community outreach events. It's the same rule that has grounded the Navy Blue Angels and Air Force Thunderbirds precision-flight teams and canceled a summer air show at Offutt Air Force Base.

“We're sad that this tradition is coming to an end. I think the Heartland of America Band is sad, too,” said Joel Long, The World-Herald's communications director. “But with the current state of the sequester and financial constraints, there was no other choice.”

In place of the downtown concerts — held since 2005 at the Holland Performing Arts Center — a much smaller band will play a series of community holiday concerts at local high schools, said Doug Roe, the band's director of operations. Suburban Newspapers Inc., a World-Herald subsidiary, will underwrite concerts Dec. 14 in Bellevue, Dec. 15 in Gretna, and Dec. 20 and 21 in Papillion. The Opinion-Tribune newspaper will sponsor a concert Dec. 8 in Glenwood, Iowa.

“These high school auditoriums aren't the Holland Performing Arts Center,” Roe said. “But through the medium of music, we're still going to entertain.”

Military bands in America date back to the colonial era, a time when commanders sometimes used music to guide troops in battle. Bands always have played at funerals, promotions, command changes and military balls.

In the modern era, their public concerts also are a public relations tool — and for many civilians, their only direct contact with the armed forces.

“For that hour and a half we're on stage, we ARE the Air Force, we ARE the military,” Roe said.

But budget cuts have battered military bands generally in recent years, and the Heartland of America Band in particular.

In 2011, Rep. Betty McCollum, D-Minn., persuaded her House colleagues to slash the Pentagon's music budget from $388 million to $200 million a year.

“Spending $388 million of the taxpayers' money on military music does not make our nation more secure,” McCollum said in a message posted last year on her House website. “It is excessive and a luxury the Pentagon can no longer afford.”

That prompted the Air Force to cut 103 band positions across the service, eliminating two of the 12 active-duty bands and sharply cutting two others, including the Heartland of America Band.

As recently as 2007, the Heartland Band featured 60 airmen. That was cut to 45 in an earlier round of budget cuts, and then to 16 in June. The eight-state region it used to cover — stretching from Montana to Iowa, and North Dakota to Kansas — was cut to a single state, Nebraska, plus a few nearby counties in Iowa.

WE INHABIT a nation whose leaders have plenty of money for financing foreign fights and entangling the American people in pointless wars of choice. We endure a government that can find a billion or three -- or 500 -- for Wall Street interests, yet the Heartland of America Band can't even field a decent flash mob anymore.

But because "government spends too much," we haven't a red cent for music. For joy. Or for lots of other things that build America and Americans up, as opposed to tearing some other country down.

I would imagine Bach -- not to mention Jesu, of joy of man's desiring fame -- might take a dim view of that, and of the barbarians we have become.

Only if your Christmas tree is a pussy willow

As I find myself often thinking the older I get . . . I picked the wrong day to quit smoking crack, snorting meth, drinking Everclear and sniffing glue.

On the other hand, there is neither enough booze nor are there enough illegal substances in the world to get this image out of my mind. Neither will there be enough to kill the section of your brain where the picture of this hideous thing now resides. Sorry about that.

On the third hand, why should I be alone in my torment? I hate being alone in my torment.

One thing I learned from this Etsy.com page, though, is that there are, per capita, just as many disturbed individuals in Canada as there are here in the United States. I blame our disturbed, shallow and hypersexualized common Western culture.

SOMETIME between the time I was born 52 years ago and now, our genitals (and what we do with them) became no mere fraction of who we are. Instead, who we are has come to be defined by our genitalia and what we choose to do with them. That's not only ass-backward, but just wrong -- as in utterly depraved.

Once upon a time, we put stars, candy canes, popcorn strings and shiny glass ornaments on our Christmas trees, which we regarded as a symbol of new life in the bleak midwinter. Now we put "Were vulva Dead Zombie" ornaments on them. How fitting, considering.

I eagerly await the advent -- not -- of the "Syphilitic Oozing Penis" yuletide ornaments, which should be arriving . . . wait, let me go check Etsy.

How low can we go?  Obviously, somewhere just below the waistline.

Lord have mercy. But I won't blame Him if He doesn't.

Merry Christmas!

Here's a quick wish that you and yours are having the merriest of Christmases and the happiest of new years.

No, I'm not late. It's Day 10 of Christmas -- two more days to go.

And you know what? Starting on Twelfth Night . . . it's Carnival season!

Ho! Ho! Ho! indeed. I love this stuff.

Last night's leftovers

Gumbo . . . yummmm.

That's one of the great things about the week between Christmas and New Year's -- the leftovers. This is the leftovers from our traditional Christmas Eve chicken-and-sausage gumbo. And the thing about leftover gumbo is this: The gumbo is always better a day or two later.

And, yes, there's a story behind the Christmas Eve gumbo.

It has been said that this was my best gumbo ever. Now. modesty prevents me from saying this myself, but if other people want to say it, who am I to stifle free speech?

That would be un-American. Burrrrrp.

Oh, the old stuff and the new stuff can be friends

If you haven't given a listen to the Christmas edition of 3 Chords & the Truth, it's not too late, you know.

You do realize that Christmas isn't over until Jan. 6, right? And until then, you can find all kinds of novel ways to listen to the Yuletide version of the Big Show.

Here's a fun way to listen to the show if you're a geek like me -- one that will bring back the sounds you grew up with if you're of (ahem) a certain age.

PLAY SOME of the stuff we have on the 2012 Christmas show on a vintage hi-fi, and "Yule" soon find out that you're cooking with gas.

Yes, the Microsoft Surface and the 1956 Realistic tuner and amplifier can be friends. Yea, and the vacuum tube shall lie down with the microprocessor, and peace shall come upon the sound system.

 Amen.

A blessed Christmas

 

Isaiah Chapter 9

1

The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; Upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone.

2

You have brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing, As they rejoice before you as at the harvest, as men make merry when dividing spoils.

3

For the yoke that burdened them, the pole on their shoulder, And the rod of their taskmaster you have smashed, as on the day of Midian.

4

For every boot that tramped in battle, every cloak rolled in blood, will be burned as fuel for flames.

5

For a child is born to us, a son is given us; upon his shoulder dominion rests. They name him Wonder-Counselor, God-Hero, Father-Forever, Prince of Peace.

6

His dominion is vast and forever peaceful, From David's throne, and over his kingdom, which he confirms and sustains By judgment and justice, both now and forever. The zeal of the LORD of hosts will do this!

3 Chords & the Truth: Yule love this gift

Christmastime is upon us. So consider this your present under the tree.

That's right, it's the 3 Chords & the Truth Christmas show -- just a little holiday token from me to you. This year, the Big Show would like to thank the fine folks at the Tin Cup Retirement Plan for their gracious sponsorship of this special Yuletide musical offering.

In today's world, you can't count on much, but you can count on your Tin Cup.

To me, a lot of this special episode of the Big Show sounds like Christmas -- just like the ones we used to know. Your mileage may vary, depending on how many years you have under your belt, but I think this holiday offering will be just as enjoyable no matter who you are.

AFTER ALL, that's the whole point of 3 Chords & the Truth . . . being enjoyable, no matter who you are. Good music -- and especially good Christmas music -- is funny that way.

So once again, let me thank the fine folks at Tin Cup Retirement Plan for making this holiday extravaganza possible, and also thank you for listening.

May your days be merry and bright,
And may all your Christmases be white

IT'S 3 Chords & the Truth, y'all. Be there. Alo-ho-ho-ho-ha.

Red Roses for a Blue Christmas

Holy Stocking Full of D Cells and Oranges, Batman!

I think I have acquired the Mother of All Baby Boomer Christmas Albums.

If you remember the 1960s -- and I remember almost all of 'em -- put this record on and suddenly it's Christmas morning, you're 6 years old, in your pajamas and tearing into what Santa Claus left for you under the tree.