I love Omaha, but one might argue -- contra the theme of the "Eastern Nebraska State Song" -- that one sign of being a "hick" state is going to great and self-conscious lengths to convince the rest of the country that you're not a hick state.
Besides, what the hell is so wrong with living in a hick state? I fell in love with Nebraska a quarter-century ago when I moved to a "hick" town in the "hick" part of the state.
I FELL IN LOVE with the Sandhills and that feeling of complete freedom you get when you look out over the grassy dunes that stretch as far as the horizon . . . and beyond. And I fell in love with living in a town where, if you don't know everybody, soon enough you probably will.
I fell in love with friendly and unpretentious people. And with giving folks a little wave when they were driving one way on a lonely road and you were headed the other.
Finally, during my stay in a hick town in -- yes -- a "hick state," I fell in love. And I married my sweetheart in a hick ceremony, in a hick house, in that wonderful hick town.
And while I'm happy for all of Omaha's growth in the two decades we've lived here -- and while it's exciting to see downtown become more and more hip and cosmopolitan every day -- telling the world Omahans aren't "hicks" and we don't live in a "hick state" ain't gonna convince Blue Staters of anything.
Not that anyone ought to give a rat's ass what they think anyway.
IF YOU LIKE where you live, and if your kids are well educated -- if they master their studies, if they likewise learn to be honest and kind and love God and their fellow man -- and if crime is low and neighborliness is high, isn't that good enough?
Because, after all, a lot of the things we value most when we pick a spot to grow roots come from the better, "hick" angels of our nature. Now, call me a hick, but I think it's high time we embrace the best of who -- and what -- we are.
And if that be "hick," "rube," "hayseed" or "Gomer," so be it.
If Noo Yawk don't like that, it can lump it. 'Cause I don't give a flying cowchip one way or another.
Perhaps these documentary segments shining a light inside WNEW-FM -- New York's late and legendary rock station -- as it was in 1982 will give you a clue:
BOY, IT WAS GOOD to see the late, great Scott Muni again, back in the day.
Download 3 Chords & the Truth here, or watch the show player pop up here.
If you want to cut a state budget, the logical place for a chop job would be all the places you can least afford it, right?
Only if you're a legislator in Louisiana.
SOME OF THE STUPIDEST members of the Stupid Party -- which, to tell the truth, could be either one in the Gret Stet -- plan to slash higher education and health care budgets to save a lousy $250 million out of a $30-plus billion spending blueprint. This in one of the stupidest and sickest states in the nation.
Which goes a long way toward explaining a lot of things, actually.
Gov. Bobby Jindal's $30.1 billion budget plan is facing friendly fire from his allies in the state House of Representatives, who are proposing to save up to $250 million by cutting planned spending on higher education, health care and other priorities.
House Speaker Jim Tucker said the goal is to reduce the state's reliance on non-recurring money to pay for ongoing programs in the fiscal year that starts July 1.
Tucker, R-Algiers, said doing so perpetuates spending policies that Republicans frequently criticized under former Gov. Kathleen Blanco. "It's got a number of members very concerned (because) they didn't get elected to continue the same-old, same-old," Tucker said.
DEAR JIMBO, I know you may not have gotten the memo, but when you get elected on an anti-same-old, same-old platform, that DOES NOT mean people want you to be an even bigger dumbass than "Mee Maw" Blanco was. When a state lags horribly behind the rest of the nation in education and health care, you don't go around crippling education and health care.
At least if you have a problem with the people around you being disproportionately ill-educated and just plain ill.
A spokesman for the Louisiana State University System said it would mean a $36.6 million cut, and that individual campuses are in the process of combing through their various programs to decide where to trim.
"The impact would be dramatic, if enacted," LSU System spokesman Charles Zewe said.
IMPACT. DRAMATIC. That for a university system that isn't even funded to the Southern regional average. I wonder what the state's GOP legislators plan for the health-care system?
Hospitals with no doctors?
Wheelchairs with no wheels?
Now, if cut $250 million they must, there are ways to do it without sacrificing, say, excellence in education or badly-needed facility upkeep.
Trouble is, the Louisiana Legislature isn't even close to dreaming of having the cojones to pare back the ridiculous number of public universities for a state of 4.2 million people and emptying out fast.
The state, of course, needs the LSU system. And it needs LSU-Baton Rouge as its "flagship" university -- the pre-eminent academic and research institution.
Excellence matters. I know Louisiana has little experience with excellence, but trust me on this. Other states "get it" -- even if many Louisianians don't.
BUT DOES LOUISIANAneed Nicholls State University an hour's drive from the University of New Orleans? Does it need McNeese State a hour down the interstate from the University of Louisiana-Lafayette?
Couldn't Southeastern Louisiana University be changed into a smallish liberal-arts college? Couldn't LSU-Alexandria and LSU-Eunice be integrated into the state's fledgling community-college system?
Should the all-but-destroyed Southern University-New Orleans have been reopened after Katrina? Should not the historically struggling historically black school now be folded into UNO or closed altogether?
Which brings us to the 800-kiloton nuclear elephant in the room.
CAN LOUISIANA really afford, both financially and sociologically -- for all intents and purposes -- one state-university system for white people and another for African-Americans?
What, in a larger sense, does this really say to a state where not only isn't the past really past, but neither is Jim Crow?
I understand the rationale for historically black colleges. I do. Likewise, I understand their heroic and proud history.
And I don't think that history ought to be ignored or these universities' role completely relegated to the landfill of days gone by.
That said, the sheer duplication of facilities and programs between "white" and "black" institutions -- usually right next door to one another -- is insane, not to mention increasingly unaffordable on any number of levels.
So here's a modest proposal.
Because it just isn't feasible, culturally or politically, to kill off the oldest such school, Southern University, it stays as is. Indeed, it possibly could be enhanced with some of the resources of closed "white" schools.
On the other hand, it doesn't need a law school. Not unless someone could come up with some desperately needed, specialized niche it might fill -- being, as it is, right under the nose of the much larger and much better law school at LSU.
That leaves Grambling State University, another school that has a proud history but has suffered from terrible leadership in recent times. Grambling, just a short drive down the road from Louisiana Tech in Ruston.
How. In. The. World. Do. You. Objectively. Justify. That?
My solution: Merge 'em . . . probably on the present Louisiana Tech campus. But call the combined institution Grambling State University and commemorate the proud role that school played in educating a people once deliberately cut off from the "mainstream" of public life.
That leaves LSU-Shreveport and Northwestern State as the last candidates for major realignment. I don't see how you can justify the existence of both.
So, how about a compromise? LSU-Shreveport could merge with Northwestern State in Natchitoches, where the new school would remain. It would be brought into the LSU System, would be renamed the University of Northwestern Louisiana and would have a satellite campus in Shreveport.
THAT'S HOW you save money without needlessly sacrificing infrastructure or educational excellence. It's not brain surgery.
It does, however, require a few things not usually associated with my home state's governing class -- political will, intestinal fortitude . . . and wisdom.
In the first Dark Ages, the barbarians were the uncouth louts who showed up at the city gates -- or, rather, stormed the city gates -- to kill, rob, rape and pillage. Fatally weakened by the rot within, even mighty Rome could not hold off the Hun armies.
In these new Dark Ages, the barbarians don't need to storm anything. They're homegrown, they're mainstream, and they're a vital part of the "bread and circuses" distracting a postmodern empire as everything falls apart. But for this multitasking generation, our "entertainment" -- in the name of lawyers, guns and money -- also represents the s*** which has hit the fan.
And now -- as the minstrel Reuters regales us -- one tribe of well-paid savages stands accused of waylaying an unsuspecting teen wearing the mark of a rival tribe, and is thus being sued for a share of their plunder:
The lawsuit filed by James Rosemond and his mother, Cynthia Reed, says Universal Music Group -- owned by Vivendi SA -- and its labels Interscope Records, G-Unit Records and Shady Records, bear responsibility for the assault because they encourage artists to pursue violent, criminal lifestyles.
The lawsuit also names 50 Cent -- whose real name is Curtis Jackson -- Violator Management, Violator CEO Chris Lighty, Tony Yayo, a rapper and a member of 50 Cent's G-Unit hip hop group, and Lowell Fletcher, an employee of Yayo.
All defendants declined to comment.
Rosemond says he was assaulted on a Manhattan sidewalk in March 2007 by four men including Yayo and Fletcher.
The lawsuit claims Rosemond was targeted because he was wearing a T-shirt by Czar Entertainment, a management company that represents The Game. The Game is a former G-Unit rapper who fell out with the group and had become a rival rapper.
PEOPLE OFTEN SPEAK of the "culture of death" solely in terms of widespread, legalized abortion. I think that's wildly inaccurate. Abortion is just a symptom. As is the gangsta cultcha for kicks and profit.
The "culture of death" is all about what we -- as free people in a free society -- have come to value, of our own free will. And in so many ways, for such a variety of souls, it is death we crave.
It is death we sow. It is death we reap.
Somewhere, Atilla the Hun surveys what's left of Western civilization, shakes his head and ruefully observes, "And they called me a barbarian."
IT'S A WORSE THING that the next most pertinent thing you can think of -- as you work your way down the "inverted pyramid" of newswriting -- would be "The coach is a WHAT?!?"
Way to go, Advocate! Why try harder when your audience is used to mediocrity?
Take the guy who set his eye on a 14-year-old girl. He wanted her somethin' bad. But there was a slight problem, apart from her being just barely 14. He was 22.
And to make things worse -- at least from the perspective of such a "monster" -- was that the relatives who took her in after her mother died were about to send her off to boarding school. So he ran off with her.
Worse than that, they were second cousins.
And worse than that, the poor child had a child by the time she was 15 -- just barely.
IF BOBBY JINDAL had been governor, the horndog would be in jail for a good long time and then, after that, would have to wear a scarlet penis for the rest of his life. And, with the exception of some nooks and crannies in the bayous and piney woods, a cry of "Damn straight!" would arise all across the Gret Stet.
Just one thing, though.
Romeo and Juliet: SVU were my maternal grandparents. They were married Dec. 24, 1905, and stayed that way until my grandfather died in 1956.
They never had it easy, not with 15 kids over the years and a Great Depression, to boot. Yet, 11 children made it to adulthood and all of those survived to old age. Two are alive still.
Not bad work for a sex offender and his victim.
OBVIOUSLY, times and mores have changed, as is evident in this story from WAFB television in Baton Rouge:
We found a man who is considered a sex offender by law. He asked to have his identity protected, so we'll call him "Sam." Sam says he is not a monster and should not be behind bars. "When I was 18, I did not research the law to find out if it was okay if I slept with a 14-year-old. I did not know that. That's why at the time, I made a stupid decision," he says. Sam says he was in love with his 14-year-old girlfriend. He met her at church. They dated. Then, he says his feelings for her got out of hand. "Before I know it, I got arrested and everything and then I caught the charge. Immature. I take full responsibility and I should have known better, but sometimes you put yourself in a situation and it's hard to go back sometimes."
Sam served five years probation, with counseling and psychological evaluations. Eventually, a local judge determined Sam was not a threat to society and waived his charges. That was about 12 years ago. "Then, all of a sudden, they came with a letter saying I have to register as a sex offender." The state Legislature passed new laws in 2004 to disregard court-appointed waivers and force people like Sam to re-visit their past. "When does my life move on? When do I escape the shadow of my mistakes?" he asks.
YOU'D HAVE TO THINK that someone smart enough to have graduated from Brown and then Oxford, like Jindal, would know that there are sex offenders, and then there are sex offenders.
"Sam" in the Channel 9 report broke a law by acting upon a natural impulse with a girl who also was a teen-ager. It was wrong, by our contemporary standards, and there were rightful consequences.
But "Sam," and those like him, are no more "dangerous sex offenders" than was my grandpa, who broke no law in 1905. My grandfather was in love with my grandmother, and he eloped with her before her uncle could send her off to a convent . . . not boarding school.
Of course, Bobby Jindal does know better -- just like he damn well knows that "contemporary standards" are a recent innovation in all corners of a state where modernity still fights a mighty battle to fan out from a tenuous beachhead.
What Louisianians need to remember is they're not so far removed from the days of the Southern demagogue, who curried favor with the booboisie by railing against the black man -- or, alternatively, Standard Oil -- all in a bid to line his pockets and build a political empire. If the ordinary voter got anything out of the deal at all, he found -- too late -- that it came with a great (and previously hidden) cost.
SO WHY is Bobby Jindal demagoguing the "sex offender" issue -- and in the process hiding genuine societal threats amid a fog of injustice that will envelop a bunch of people who did something stupid, but not unnatural, when they were kids?
That's what I want to know about this "reform" governor who held so much promise but is quickly degenerating into just another doctrinaire Republican, dispensing the same old stuff from the same old GOP manure spreader.
Naturally, the Louisiana Legislature probably will be stupid enough to pass this Jindal foolishness unmolested. Just like some God-fearin', prevert-bashin', good ol' boy will watch the Channel 9 report and yell "Damn right they need to lock up them PREverts! Kill them sumbitches!" at the TV set.
Right before he gets that quizzical look on his face, turns to the wife/shack-up/girlfriend, and sayeth:
The Mayor of New Orleans has begun his 6 day trip to China.
Ray Nagin left yesterday and will return next Sunday.
The Mayor is travelling to Zhengzhou to later join 400 Mayors from China and around the world in participating in the International Mayor's Forum on Tourism, April 9th-11th.
He'll also visit Beijing and Shanghai.
Nagin is joined on the trip by the city's director of international relations, Lisa Ponce de Leon and by a representative of the New Orleans U.S. Export Assistance Center.
According to the Mayor's press office, the trip will include private meetings with Chinese officials who are working "in areas of investment and distribution" and it says Nagin will participate in panel discussions on a variety of topics including emergency preparedness and tourism development.
The Absolut vodka company apologized Saturday for an ad campaign depicting the southwestern U.S. as part of Mexico amid angry calls for a boycott by U.S. consumers.
The campaign, which promotes ideal scenarios under the slogan "In an Absolut World," showed a 1830s-era map when Mexico included California, Texas and other southwestern states. Mexico still resents losing that territory in the 1848 Mexican-American War and the fight for Texas independence.
But the ads, which ran only in Mexico and have since ended, came as the United States builds up its border security amid an emotional debate over illegal immigration from their southern neighbor.
(snip)
Absolut said the ad was designed for a Mexican audience and intended to recall "a time which the population of Mexico might feel was more ideal."
"As a global company, we recognize that people in different parts of the world may lend different perspectives or interpret our ads in a different way than was intended in that market, and for that we apologize."
As a 7-year-old, I knew that a bad, bad thing had happened to an important man. I knew the man was dead. I knew people were rioting because he was dead.
BUT AS A Southern child growing up in a working-class, white and illiberal milieu, the only thing I knew about the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., was that he was not afforded the commonly benign label of "colored" and certainly not the formal moniker of "Negro" -- which you only heard on the TV and radio, anyway.
I had heard that he was something called a "communiss."
What I would find out later -- as I grew in knowledge and as my world grew in size and scope -- was that Martin Luther King Jr,. died not only so that African-Americans could be free in this "land of the free," but so that I might be free, too.
We may not be totally free yet, but we're getting there. And because one man obeyed his God all the way to his own Calvary, we -- all of us, black and white -- are a lot closer than we would be otherwise.
This week's edition of 3 Chords & the Truth is dedicated to remembering and mourning what happened in Memphis, Tenn., four decades ago Friday. America is a much changed country for the assassinations of King and, a mere two months later, Sen. Robert Kennedy.
That change was a profoundly tragic one from which we've yet to recover. All these years later, the wounds still bleed.
But the Big Showalso celebrates a momentous life -- and the profound difference it made in this country and in the world.
On this week's program, you won't hear me getting in the way of the music . . . or the message. Thus, I'll publish this week's playlist below.
Enjoy the show.
Say It (Over and Over Again) John Coltrane Quartet w/ McCoy Tyner (piano), Jimmy Garrison (bass), Elvin Jones (drums) 1962
It Feels Like Rain Aaron Neville 1991
Help Us, Somebody Chris Thomas 1990
The Sky Is Crying Elmore James 1960
Keep On Pushing Curtis Mayfield & the Impressions 1964
Redemption Song Joe Strummer & the Mescaleros 2003
Memphis Blues Again Bob Dylan 1966
Boulevard of Broken Dreams Green Day 2004
Inner City Blues Dirty Dozen Brass Band 2006
Don't Burn Baby Sly & the Family Stone 1968
We Gotta Live Together Jimi Hendrix 1970
Motherless Child Hootie & the Blowfish 1994
Nothing Lasts Matthew Sweet 1991
Faithful To Me (Reprise) Jennifer Knapp 1997
Lay My Burden Down (feat. Mavis Staples & the Dirty Dozen Brass Band) Dr. John 2004
On April 3, 1968, the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. gave his last speech, in Memphis, Tenn.
HE WAS THEREin support of striking sanitation workers, who were protesting low pay and abysmal working conditions, and his oration that night -- prophetic, some called it -- would become one of his most famous.
Forty years ago today, on April 4, 1968, a bullet ripped into King's face and neck as he stood on the balcony outside his room at the Lorraine Motel.
It was about 5:45 p.m.
Doctors pronounced him dead about an hour and 15 minutes later. The Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. was 39 years old.
The Rev. Samuel "Billy" Kyles, a local minister and King friend who was there that night, believes King was forecasting his own death. "I am so certain he knew he would not get there," Kyles said. "He didn't want to say it to us, so he softened it -- that he may not get there." Later, Kyles would tell people that King "had preached himself through the fear of death."
What is often unremarked upon about that speech, however, is how resolute King was in his prescriptions for fighting the injustices suffered by the poor. He urged those at the meeting to tell their neighbors: Don't buy Coca-Cola, Sealtest milk and Wonder Bread. Up to now, only the garbage workers had been feeling pain, King noted. "Now we must kind of redistribute the pain."
The next day, King was in a good mood, almost giddy, Kyles remembered. Kyles was hosting a dinner for King at his home that evening. "I told him it was at 5 because he was never in a hurry." But when Kyles knocked on King's door, at Room 306 of the Lorraine Motel, to hurry him along, King let him know he had uncovered the little ruse: He had found out the dinner was actually at 6. So they had some time, and King invited Kyles to sit down. Abernathy was there, too. King liked to eat and was anticipating a lavish soul-food feast, so he couldn't resist razzing Kyles. "I bet your wife can't cook," King told his friend. "She's too pretty."
Just to tease a little more, King asked Kyles: Didn't you just buy a new house? He then told the story of an Atlanta preacher who had purchased a big, fancy home and had King and Coretta over for dinner. "The Kool-Aid was hot, the ham was cold, the biscuits were hard," Kyles recalled King jiving. "If I go to your house and you don't have a decent dinner, I'm going to tell the networks that the Rev. Billy Kyles had a new house but couldn't afford to have a decent dinner."
It was about 5:45 when King and Kyles left the room and stepped onto the second-floor balcony. Abernathy stayed put. King leaned over the rail to gaze at a busy scene in the parking lot eight feet below, exchanging words with his young aide Jesse Jackson, among others. Kyles was just about to descend the steps, with King behind him, when he heard the shot. "And when I looked around, he had been knocked from the railing of the balcony back to the door," Kyles recalled. "I saw a gaping hole on the right side of his face."
Kyles ran back into the room and tried to call for an ambulance, but no one at the motel switchboard answered. He took a bedspread and draped it over King's body.
King was pronounced dead at 7 p.m. at St. Joseph's Hospital.
"Forty years ago, I had no words to express my feelings; I had stepped away from myself," recalled Kyles, now 73, the pastor at Monumental Baptist Church in Memphis. "Forty years later I still have no words to describe my feelings."
For years, Kyles struggled with an internal question: "Why was I there?" And at some point, he can't remember when, "God revealed to me, I was there to be a witness. Crucifixions have to have a witness."
con·ser·va·tism \kÉ™n-ˈsÉ™r-vÉ™-ËŒti-zÉ™m\ n (1832) 1 capitalized a: the principles and policies of a Conservative party b: the Conservative party
2a: disposition in politics to preserve what is established b: a political philosophy based on tradition and social stability, stressing established institutions, and preferring gradual development to abrupt change; specifically : such a philosophy calling for lower taxes, limited government regulation of business and investing, a strong national defense, and individual financial responsibility for personal needs (as retirement income or health-care coverage)
3: the tendency to prefer an existing or traditional situation to change
SUPPOSE A SPACE ALIEN landed somewhere in these United States tomorrow and began studying our culture, our media and our politics.
Considering what passes for "conservative thought" at the beginning of these new Dark Ages -- and assuming the existence of an English-to-Zorkonian version of the Merriam-Webster dictionary -- our visitor might end up making some very wrong assumptions about what America has been all about these past 232 years.
And he'd probably report back to the home planet that there's this embattled fellow in Chicago, name of the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, who is a prophet sent from God and suffering much the same fate as his Old Testament namesake from this earthling spiritual guidebook -- "The Bible," it is called.
He would relay that "conservatives" are a fierce and violent lot who apparently hate everyone and everything, seek to kill as many real or imagined "enemies" as possible and are prone to being tendentious braggarts. Also, the Zorkonians would learn -- to their utter horror -- that conservatives' artistic and cultural output resembles Klingon opera as much as anything
And these "conservatives" even may harbor a taste for gagh, not to mention bloodwine.
Likewise, the scout from Zorkon would report that the United States' "conservative" goverment apparently is dedicated to ceaseless war and employs torture against enemy prisoners, a practice widely celebrated by American conservatives.
Great. These earthling ideologues seem to harbor all the worst traits of the Klingons and the Cardassians.
Preliminary recommendation: A mandatory quarantine of Earth, with no outside contact permitted. Also, continue close observation; reserve the right to launch tactical photon-torpedo strikes against the "United States" region if the Americans develop warp-propulsion technology.
IF A SPACE ALIEN came down from the heavens tomorrow, could we -- would we -- blame him for thinking such about our country seven years into the Shameful Administration? Could the last two or three thoughtful conservatives blame a total outsider for equating their political philosophy with intellectual softness, rhetorical inconsistency and rank barbarism?
Can a movement whose proud members are apt to decry legal abortion while defending waterboarding while wearing a "Rope. Tree. Journalist" T-shirt be taken seriously . . . even a little bit?
I don't think so. Not unless one is a political and cultural anthropologist conducting a study on how modern conservatism got from William F. Buckley to Benito Mussolini (with a dash of Mao Zedong-style cultism thrown in) in 50 short years.
I SUPPOSE, at this point, I could launch into multiple pull quotes from multiple outrageous columns by Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Jonah Goldberg or any number of lesser lights from the farm teams of "conservative" punditry.
Oh, what the hell. How about just a couple from WorldNetDaily's Joseph Farah, who doesn't just tolerate waterboarding -- he hearts it:
It was used successfully to learn about terrorist operations planned by two of al-Qaida's top operatives – Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, involved in the planning of the 9/11 attack, and Abu Zubaida, another leader of the terrorist organization.
Apparently both of these mass killers endured many hours of coercive interrogations without talking. But they sung like canaries after a few seconds of waterboarding.
In both cases, there is reason to believe planned terrorist attacks were foiled as a result of this technique.
Nevertheless, there is a growing chorus of opposition against any further use of waterboarding in similar or even more dire scenarios.
Let's use our heads for a minute.
Imagine American law enforcement or military authorities have captured a terrorist mastermind who has knowledge about an imminent nuclear detonation in an unknown American city. He knows the time, the location and the details about the warhead.
The bomb could be going off at any minute. It could kill hundreds of thousands of innocent people.
Would you really want waterboarding to be banned under all circumstances? What alternatives would you suggest for quick results? Should we call in top negotiators from the State Department? Should we play loud rap music? Should we force the prisoner to listen to Hillary Rodham Clinton speeches?
While I also find those experiences unpleasant, I don't think they would produce the needed results in time to defuse the bomb.
Let's not tie the hands of future Jack Bauers who will need to do what they have to do to save lives.
I personally think Mohammed and Zubaida got off way too easy with waterboarding.
I would personally have performed far more unpleasant procedures on them without a twinge of guilt in my conscience. Real torture techniques would have been appropriate in both cases.
Tell me, where is due process for those unborn children sentenced to death while still in the womb?
Some abortion advocates have tried to suggest that Roe v. Wade – an arbitrary and capricious attempt by the Supreme Court to exceed its constitutional limitations and legislate – is itself the due process for unborn babies.
Once again, however, the Constitution trumps that poor excuse for an argument.
"Amendment VI: In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state and district wherein the crime shall have been committed; which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defense."
Roe v. Wade is, thus, a sham – a house of cards. It was an artificial attempt to make abortion a right by citing a "right of privacy" that is itself nowhere to be found in the Constitution. Roe v. Wade created rights where none existed and abrogated those that were enshrined as unalienable.
I rest my case.
But I will not rest entirely until this nation is awakened to abortion as both a national tragedy as well as a constitutional threat to all of our God-given rights – as well as an endangerment to the lives and liberties of our posterity.
OBVIOUSLY, Joseph Farah is just making this s*** up as he goes.
By what stretch of what dictionary-conservative (as opposed to "Do what thou wilt" fascistic "conservatism") definition does someone reason that God-given rights apply more to cute little fetuses than scum-sucking Islamic terrorists?
If the rights asserted in the Declaration of Independence and codified in the U.S. Constitution emanated from a Creator -- as went the Founders' contention -- by what authority do today's addle-minded right-wingers proclaim that God-given rights and God-bestowed dignity is the birthright of unborn baby and me, but maybe not thee?
They proclaim it by their own authority, that's how. Run like hell when you see folks with hate in their eyes and blood on their hands trying to wrap the Almighty in an American flag.
Kyle Michaelis over at the New Nebraska Networkblog is upset that some Nebraska and Iowa Republican congressmen are upset over an explicit Planned Parenthood website aimed at teen-agers.
Yesterday's Omaha World-Herald included a cheap attack on a sexual education website for teenagers run by Planned Parenthood. Probably the worst thing about the front-page article - other than the complete idiocy, opportunism, and childishness of Nebraska's Republican Congressmen - is that the World-Herald never even gave the name of the website or published its internet address so readers could judge it for themselves.
IT'S PRETTY BASIC JOURNALISM to name what you're talking about, so you won't find me defending the silly refusal to identify TeenWire.com. Facts are facts, and newspapers ought not be in the business of deleting one of the "five W's" -- who, what, when, where, why -- because an editor was prone to the vapors.
But neither am I a fan of knee-jerk "progressives" who never miss an opportunity to further an unreflective party line by slinging intolerant invective in the name of "tolerance." Like this, for example:
The site in question is TeenWire.com. It's a shame the World-Herald would allow the site to be insulted like this without even giving it a name and listing its address. But, then those few young people who read the World-Herald might actually be able to get some real information about safe and responsible sexual health. Of course, we wouldn't want that.
(snip)
The facts - and the website - speak for themselves. Rather than listening to those, the World-Herald listened to four jackass Republican Congressmen who are desperate for some good press and resorting to cheap shots at an easy target.
As for Terry, Fortenberry, and Smith - and their even more contemptible counterpart from Iowa - their attack on this website and their continued support for this failed experiment in abstinence-only education are simply unforgivable.
They are pandering to the far right-wing, embracing ignorance that is killing Nebraska teenagers. There is no justice for a crime and a sin so ugly and reprehensible - at least, not in this lifetime.
WHAT? NO SLURS against the Catholic Church while he was at it? No obligatory "Get your rosaries off women's ovaries" mantra?
Then again, if you're so far over the top that you're shrieking about "embracing ignorance that is killing Nebraska teenagers" and "no justice for a crime and sin so ugly and reprehensible," a little gratuitous Papist bashing would just be anticlimactic.
But I am curious about something.
If there's "no justice" for the "crime and sin" (yadda yadda yadda) of "pandering" to GOP congressmen upset over an explicit and tacky website aimed at teens, how, then, are we to view a group that's willing to earmark donations specifically for ridding the world of African-Americans?
I think two words would describe such a group -- "racist" and "genocidal." Come to think of it, two more words would describe such a group . . . "Planned Parenthood." You know, the people the New Nebraska Network seems to be so fond of.
Watch these videos produced by The Advocate, a magazine published by a pro-life student group at UCLA, and be horrified. Unless, of course, you're Kyle Michaelis.
Sancte Michael Archangele, defende nos in proelio. contra nequitiam et insidias diaboli esto praesidium. Imperet illi Deus, supplices deprecamur: tuque, Princeps militiae coelestis, Satanam aliosque spiritus malignos, qui ad perditionem animarum pervagantur in mundo, divina virtute, in infernum detrude. Amen.
This could have been my first NC-17 post if I had embedded the video depicting what's being exhibited at the Dommuseum in Vienna. That smutty "art" is being exhibited in some European museum isn't, in itself, exceptional.
What's exceptional is when smutty art -- including depictions of the Last Supper as a homosexual orgy and a naked Roman soldier performing a sex act on the crucified Christ -- is the focus of an exhibit at the art museum of the Catholic cathedral of St. Stephen. Well, it used to be exceptional -- back when the faithful still recited the prayer to St. Michael the Archangel at the end of every Mass.
The Dommuseum in Vienna, the art gallery attached to the historic Catholic cathedral of St. Stephen, is running an exhibition of works by a self-avowed Marxist atheist, titled "Religion, Flesh and Power," that includes depictions of explicit homosexual sex acts. Prominent among the works is a rendition of the Last Supper with Christ and His Apostles depicted as homosexuals engaged in an orgy.
Another work depicts Christ on the cross without a face but with uncovered genitals. The Last Supper rendition is displayed in a prominent place near the entrance to the exhibition, LifeSiteNews.com reported Wednesday.
Dommuseum Director Bernhard Böhler said visitors asked "in a more or less emotional way" why the Apostles are depicted copulating. According to the director, the artist responded, "There were no women around."
AND AT THE DOMMUSEUM, one might suppose there are no actual Christians around. Next door to the cathedral. Literally under the nose of Cardinal Christoph Schönborn. Who needs to redecorate his museum with a can of lighter fluid and a match.
It is said that Pope Leo XIII composed the prayer to St. Michael in 1896 after receiving a vision of how Satan would attack the Church for roughly 100 years, beginning in the 20th century. I think we've been getting a damned good idea of why Leo XIII went as pale as a corpse and rushed to his office to compose the prayer, which he ordered recited after every Catholic Mass.
That practice ended in 1965, after the Second Vatican Council's revision of the liturgy.
Oops.
If Muslims get apoplectic about cartoons of Muhammad with a bomb in his turban, Christians have every cause to get three times more exercised over this blasphemy aimed at God Himself. God will deal with the Marxist, atheist artist, Vienna's Alfred Hrdlicka.
Pope Benedict XVI needs to deal with Schönborn, the prelate who allowed this sacrilege -- this scandal -- on his watch, at his cathedral, in its art museum.
If you want a succinct, truthful answer about what ails Louisiana, you don't go to a politician. Politicians lie for a living because they have to -- because you can't handle the truth.
No, if you want to find out what's wrong with Louisiana -- what's wrong with it at its core, and what always has been wrong with it -- you go to someone who has to face facts or end up out of a job. You go to an old baseball coach.
You go to one of the best baseball coaches ever.
And, during the course of a 225 magazine profileof LSU's retiring AD, Skip Bertman -- the man with five College World Series titles on his resume -- the old coach tells us the problem with Looziana:
Months before his first game in purple and gold, Bertman met with Broadhead with a plan to build bigger crowds. He wanted to install 100 regular chair back seats behind home plate.
“Jeez, Skip, that costs a lot of money,” the A.D. said.
“No, I’m going to make money,” Bertman shot back. “The seats cost $40, and I’m going to sell them for $100.”
Eventually Broadhead conceded. Bertman went on to double attendance that first year (and for several years afterward until LSU led the nation in attendance his final six seasons). “Broadhead came back at the end of the season and said, ‘Why don’t you put in some more?’” Bertman recalls with a sly smile.
For a former catcher, Bertman acts an awful lot like a closer. He had to do an incredible amount of convincing that first season, and years later his clashes with Joe Dean became underground legends in LSU circles. In a lot of ways he still believes his mission is to change minds. And he will need that instinct as a fundraiser, because, from his bosses to his players, from the governor to the maintenance crew that chafed under his daily calls for updates on Alex Box, Bertman has noticed something about Louisiana: Mediocrity is accepted.
“When the past governor and the one before her say, ‘We want to get to the Southern average,’ I think, ‘Our goal is to be average?’” Bertman says. “I’m not putting them down, and I understand what they mean, but you can imagine how that sounds to me. I’m not saying I could be governor and not have to say that, but in baseball I could do it.” Bertman recalls having to convince his 1984 team that they were unique and capable of achieving their goals. Two years later LSU finished fifth in the country, and by then all his players had to do for a confidence boost was put on the uniform.
America, a nation that has forgotten both God and common sense, busies itself this electoral "silly season" looking for messiahs in all the wrong places.
ON THE LEFT, some of Sen. Barack Obama's sillier supportersseem to think he, if only we elect him president, might lead us to the Promised Land. After all, the man is black (and white!), he's cool under fire and he gives a hell of a speech.
Meanwhile, on the right, some of the sillier members of a stupid party are looking into the fever swamps of Louisiana for their messiah. After all, the state's new governor, Bobby Jindal, is brown, he's a scary-smart policy wonk and he's conservative, dammit . . . whatever "conservative" happens to mean this month.
Now, silly young people designing silly faux-religious icons with Obama's serene visage replacing that of Christ, the Virgin Mary or a saint are way up there on the silly-o-meter.
And sillier yet might be author Alice Walker writing columns in British newspapers with prose like "He is, in fact, a remarkable human being, not perfect but humanly stunning, like King was and like Mandela is. He is the change America has been trying desperately and for centuries to hide, ignore, kill."
BUT I AM NOT convinced that, for all its nuttery, the Obama worship is any crazier than that of Jindal by the GOP chattering classes. I mean, get a load of thisby Mary Katharine Ham on Townhall.com:
There once was a man who campaigned on a message of hope and change. In his victory speech he promised never to succumb to a worldview in which “lobbyists begin to look larger and the people begin to look smaller.” In exchange, he asked voters to help him “defeat cynicism” by believing in him and themselves.
For schools, for government, for business, “change is not just on the way . . . Change begins tonight,” he proclaimed, his quick grin and young family breathing life back into a process gone sour, his unique life story bringing voters from unexpected backgrounds.
Sound familiar? It should. You’ve heard the media tell the story a thousand times a day. They’re just telling it about the wrong guy.
These days, Bobby Jindal is working for change in a city that could eat the ethical foibles of Obama’s Chicago for breakfast, like so many shrimp upon a bed of grits. Elected governor of Louisiana in 2007, he replaced the politically deflated Kathleen Blanco, who did not seek reelection.
Jindal is keenly aware of the problematic legacy he inherits. Inside Huey Long’s sky-scraping capital building, “I wonder what crimes were committed here?” is a not infrequent visitor question, posed not quite jokingly. The state’s political history is fraught with the kind of men Southerners often euphemistically call “colorful,” who given proper federal investigation, end up being very uneuphemistically corrupt.
READY TO PUKE?No? Well hang on, then. Read this and, soon enough, you'll be purging like a New York model after a cheesecake binge:
He’s also aware of the opportunity his state offers. Hurricanes Katrina and Rita were talked about, on a national level, as revelations of persistent poverty in America. In Louisiana, they were a reminder, too, of the political perfidy that’s perpetuated it.
“Shame on us if all we build is what was here before,” Jindal told a small group of bloggers at the governor’s mansion in Baton Rouge last week.
Unwilling to accept Louisiana as it was — one of the most uneducated, unethical, and unhealthy states in the union — Jindal made ethics reform his first priority, working on the theory that being a national punchline doesn’t draw business investment.
The 36-year-old governor slid into a January special legislative session on the strength of his political capital and came out with one of the strongest ethics reform packages in a nation awash with attempts at reform.
(snip)
To Jindal, the big-government response to Hurricane Katrina betrayed conservatives’ lack of confidence in their own ideas, and his first three months in office have gone a long way toward showing he has all the courage of conviction he needs.
The Republican Party remains the party of ideas in Louisiana, under Jindal’s leadership. And, as the unabashed policy wonk runs through four-point plan after four-point plan in his detailed recipe for Cajun-style reform, his 3-year-old son big-wheeling through the foyer of the governor’s mansion, one can’t help but think, “So this is what real change looks like.”
OH. PUH. LEEZE. Just because the Democrats of Louisiana are, indeed, sad specimens it does not therefore follow that the state's Republicans -- headed by Jindal or no -- are exactly a bunch of Einsteins.
Before Jindal's election, about the biggest idea the Louisiana GOP had was "For a good time, call Wendy Cortez." And we see where that got U.S. Sen. David Vitter.
No, this is the time for change, real change. This is a time for someone whom everybody knows to be the rising star of the GOP, the new governor of Louisiana, Bobby Jindal.
And what a governor! Having taken office in January, after winning 54% of the vote in the open-field primary, Mr. Jindal immediately called a special session of the legislature and persuaded them to pass his 64-point agenda for ethics reform. They said ethics reform couldn't be done in Louisiana--a state whose reputation as a cesspool is legendary--but he did it in a two-week session. Now he's calling a second special session to pass the tax cuts necessary to jump-start the post-Katrina economy in his state.
I'M MIDDLE-AGED, I'm too fat, and I have a bad knee. If I went back home to touch the hem of my gubna's bidness suit, do you think I could be thin, young and have my lost hair back?
I didn't think so.
But it seems like Rebubbacans -- in some cases, the same ones who've been so aghast at the messianism of the Cult of Obama -- lust to bestow no less a plethora of mythical, wonder-working powers upon their own Great Brown Hope.
And the Rebubbacans' "theological proofs" are even more scanty than the Cult of Obama's. After all, the Louisiana savior merely jumped from wonkdom to wonkdom before losing to Kathleen Blanco in the 2003 gubernatorial race, then served an undistinguished term and a half in the U.S. House of Representatives.
Now, let me return to some of that Ham-handed purple prose on Townhall.com.
Jindal is the GOP messiah because he's going to fix "one of the most uneducated, unethical, and unhealthy states in the union." Oh, yes. He will do this despite being born, raised, educated and culturally assimilated in "one of the most uneducated, unethical, and unhealthy states in the union."
See, Bobby Jindal went to my old high school -- Baton Rouge Magnet High -- almost a decade after I did. It was -- and is -- an island of excellence established, staffed and funded by the East Baton Rouge Parish School Board, a governmental body Louisiana Republicans just love to hate . . . and which they regularly try to deny tax revenue because it's irredeemably awful, don't you know?
SO WHAT WE HAVE is the Rebubbacans' new messiah, educated by a school system that oughtn't have been able to properly educate a GOP savior . . . because it had not yet been healed by his policy touch. After all, Jindal was still in his messianic-formation program -- in that Louisiana public school.
In a school system many white Baton Rougeans, many of them loyal Rebubbacans, were so busy fleeing.
Got that?
Oops.
What kind of Republican messiah is this who can arise from unhealthy, unethical and uneducated backwardness? Probably an unneeded one. To steal a line from that other messiah, Louisianians themselves are the change they've been waiting for.
All they've needed all along is to just do it.
Right there in Baton Rouge, ordinary citizens and their "broken" institutions already have, after all, turned out a real-life political savior. Go figure.
This has New Orleans written all over it. "This" being a look back at one of the most creative, entertaining and notorious radio news operations ever to hit the amplitude-modulated airwaves "back there then."
ONLY THING IS, this was in Detroit. Or, more precisely, in Windsor, Ontario, at the Big 8, CKLW . . . the Top-40 blowtorch of the Motor City, where nobody tuned out when 20/20 News came on at 20 till and 20 past the hour.
And since it seems that New Orleans is the New Detroit -- particularly in deadly mayhem -- it just may be that the Crescent City is a 20/20 News kind of town.
I can't say I approve of the wild and woolly 20/20 ethos -- though I will admit to being greatly entertained by it, in a guilty sort of manner -- but I will say that if a New Orleans radio station tried it today in K-Ville, it just might make money as fast as Murdertown's blood-stained purveyors of rigor mortis crank out fresh corpses for the coroner's cadaver-stackin' toe-tag team.
Just ahead of much more music on Revolution 21, I'm the Mighty Favog . . . 20/20 News.
I FELL IN LOVE with the Sandhills and that feeling of complete freedom you get when you look out over the grassy dunes that stretch as far as the horizon . . . and beyond. And I fell in love with living in a town where, if you don't know everybody, soon enough you probably will.
