Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Pampers or Huggies?

Louisiana's junior U.S. senator, David "Let's Get Down Tonight" Vitter -- if he has any love for his state or any concern for its tarnished reputation -- needs to be a man and resign his office.

Porno king Larry Flynt has done to him what he did to ex-Louisiana congressman Bob Livingston, telling all the world about how another Louisiana pol has been thinking with his little head instead of his big one.

And then a notorious New Orleans madam to the rich and connected got into the act, "defending" Vitter's good name by telling the world what a stand up guy the senator was when he frequented her cathouse as a mere state legislator.

I'm sure Vitter's missus is thrilled to hear it.

AS I AM SURE his benighted state is thrilled at the very thought of what might come next to make the rest of America laugh at it. And make the rest of America feel better about conjuring up new reasons to cut off the hurricane recovery cash flow and let the horndog rustics stew in their own body fluids.

And you know the Vitter saga is gonna get worse. That is, worse for Louisiana. It'll just get more amusing for the rest of us.

TAKE THIS, for instance. It comes from a New Orleans blog,
Your Right Hand Thief:

Tonight I got confirmation from a solid inside source who has no ideological ax to grind. The source said Vitter was a client at Canal Street, and provided some additional details that shed light on Maier's comment that there was "more to the business than sex". [Update: Based on her comments about Vitter not having "unusual predilections", I would interpret this comment to mean something like companionship and social interaction rather than fetishes... etc.] These details are not for the faint of heart, either.

We're talking about, among other things, Diaper Fetishism. That's right folks, according to a trusted inside source, Vitter was well known among other Canal Street Brothel patrons to like diapers as well as other bizarre "fetishes". I don't have much more info than that from my source, except that some of the other patrons at the brothel included a well known business-minded New Orleans Republican and a well known Democratic ex-governor. There are many other well known patrons who never held public office, too. You've probably heard various names floated about.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love that New Orleans has more than its share of sex fetishists and preeverts who
[edited for taste -- R21]
. This ain't a vanilla town, kids.

But the thought of Vitter prancing around in a dipey is a bit jarring, especially since I'm changing those nasty things every day. I can't help picturing the scene and wondering about the details. I assume they were adult sized. But were they cloth or disposable? Did they get dirty? Was there a diaper genie available? What about a tube of Boudreaux's? Were they customized in Vitter Blue? How old were Vitter's children when this was going on? Did he change diapers in the morning and then wear them at night?

*shudder*
NOW, THIS MAY BE SOLID . . . or not. The blog could be full of bull, and its sources could be bull(ahem)ing the proprietor. But the press will be on the case, and people will talk -- one way or another.

And the contents of the dirty diapers will hit the fan.

And no one will be able to hear the lamentations of suffering Louisianians . . . because the rest of the country will be laughing too hard. At them.

Vitter needs to get his diapered ass out of the Senate, out of politics and go home to his family, which is suffering because he couldn't keep it in his pants. Or his Huggies, as the case may be.

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