Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Paris. Boil. Butt. Humanity.

One thing I do regret is that Jerry Falwell did not live long enough to kick the ass of this snobby, spoiled little B-I-itch.

Paris Hilton needs Jesus. Well, she needed better parents to start off with, but now what she really needs is Jesus.

Before she's "in a good place" for the Holy Spirit to do that voodoo that He do, however, someone is just going to have to kick her ass, because right now she's acting like nothing more than a boil on the collective buttocks of the human race.
From The Daily Mail of London:

Just when she thought things couldn't possibly get any worse, pictures have surfaced of Paris Hilton surreptitiously smoking cannabis.

The 26-year-old heiress was photographed allegedly smoking a joint while backstage at last month's Coachella music festival.

Paris attended the event with a group of pals weeks before her court hearing, but clearly wasn't concerned about keeping out of trouble ahead of the case.

Hilton now faces a 45-day jail term for for driving while her licence was suspended.

As it stands, Hilton - who has appealed to the Governor Arnold Schwartzenegger for a pardon via an online petition - is scheduled to be admitted to jail on June 5.

The online Free Paris Hilton petition has gathered more than 25,000 signatures - but unfortunately for the reality TV star, a rival campaign, Jail Paris Hilton, is twice as popular, with more than 60,000 supporters.

Hilton can expect tough conditions at LA's Century Regional Detention Center where is set to serve her time.

Her cell will be approximately 12 feet by 8 feet and feature very basic amenities such as a sink, toilet and mirror.

According to reports, inmates are forbidden from wearing makeup and hair extensions, and are allowed only two pairs of socks and underpants.

PERSONALLY, what with a disjointed Paris flipping her lid all over Creation, I was rooting for the Joe Arpaio 12-Step Program to straighten that girl out, but good. Alas, it isn't to be.

Damn.

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