If Barney Fife had gone gangsta

Or, Laurel and Hardy do Columbine. (Link requires free registration.)

Thank God. A non-doofus could have pulled off mass murder at this Omaha high school Thursday.

The lights were out in the Northwest High School classroom Thursday morning so the students in the child development class could take notes off the overhead projector.

Their teacher had said it was all right to talk, so Michael Brannon was standing up, chatting with a girl, said Michael Betts, a senior in the class.

Brannon had his hands in the pocket of his hooded jacket.

Then came a loud, booming noise, Betts said. The teacher said, "What was that?"

Brannon "didn't cry out, didn't shout or nothing. He just looked scared," Betts said. "He started saying, 'I didn't do it! I swear to God, I didn't do it!'"

Robert Michael Brannon, a 17-year-old sophomore, had accidentally shot himself in the finger. The bullet also grazed his thigh before it hit the floor, Omaha police said.

Betts said once the students realized that Brannon had been shot, girls screamed, the teacher -- who thought it was a firecracker -- called for security and Brannon ran.

Brannon went from Northwest, at 8204 Crown Point Ave., to Immanuel Medical Center, a mile and a half away at 6901 N. 72nd St., where he was treated for his injuries. It wasn't clear whether Brannon got to the hospital on foot or by car.

Betts said that a few minutes after the gun went off, students noticed a hole in the carpeting about four feet from where Brannon had been standing. A shell casing was a couple of feet from the hole.

Students leave Northwest High School after the school was locked down Thursday.

En route to the hospital, Omaha Public Schools spokeswoman Luanne Nelson said, Brannon called his grandmother to say he had been injured by a firecracker and was headed to the hospital. A school administrator later called her to tell her that Brannon had left the building.

The grandmother told the administrator of Brannon's phone call, and the school resource officer, an Omaha police officer, went to Immanuel.

Brannon hid the gun somewhere between the school and the hospital, police said.

As young master Brannon is now finding out, happiness is NOT a warm gun. Bang, bang. Shoot, shoot . . . OW!